Before I met Meng Lu, I had imagined her appearance. By voice, I judged her to be only about 28 years old and beautiful. But when I found her in the café, I was still amazed by her appearance: a blue fur coat, black pointed patent leather boots, soft and straight hair, pouring down from the sides and spilling over her shoulders, stylish but not ostentatious. When she speaks, she always looks me straight in the eye... ...
Love, the fierce wind is generally coming at me
Maybe because I often play bad women, many men think that I am also very promiscuous in my life, so I have met many rogue men. But it was just a chance encounter. What really hurt me was a love affair that I thought was self-righteous.
It was one day at the end of 1999, and I was filming the TV series "The Condor Woman" on location. I matched Li Zhixi and played the fake little dragon girl. In the play, the fake little dragon girl wants to seduce the other party when he is drunk. I acted very passionately in that scene. When the director called to stop, I found that there were hundreds of people around. It was then that I saw a man at the front looking at me furiously. He was in his thirties, tall, with a shaved chin glowing blue and looking masculine.
I was very uncomfortable with the beam of eyes and quickly avoided it. I've met a lot of lustful people, and I think he's probably just one of those lustful men. Soon, I was shooting another film on another location, and I noticed that those eyes reappeared. After the scene was finished, I was about to leave, and the man smiled and walked over: "Hello Meng Lu!" Can I get to know you? Your play is very engaging, very good. His eyes were filled with admiration. From his business card, I learned that his name is Fan Zhengtao (pseudonym) and he has served as the director of production in more than a dozen TV series.
My heart couldn't help but move. Multiple friends and multiple paths, as a freelance actor, I need to make friends in the circle. So I said, "Hello Director Fan, please pay more attention to it in the future!" Rest assured, with my friend, there is nothing in the circle that can't be decided!" He waved his hand and said rather proudly.
After a few words, he enthusiastically offered to take me home. Embarrassed, I took a sister and sat in his car. In the car, he told me that he and the assistant director of the crew were friends and had just come over today. He also said that they were preparing to shoot "Wu Dalang and Pan Jinlian" and needed to recruit actresses. As he drove, he turned his head and said to me, "Your play path is very distinctive." Pan Jinlian in "Wu Dalang and Pan Jinlian" is very suitable for you, and I will recommend you. ”
After sending his girlfriend away, he found a tea at the Sanlitun bar. He told me that he had participated in a lot of youth, banquet films, and used a lot of new actors. As we chatted, his gaze became warm and pulsating. He reached over and took my hand and said, "Meng Lu, you are very sexy. I've been running around the film and television industry for so many years, and I've never seen a girl as sexy and charming as you. You beat me so much! Be my girlfriend and marry me!" He said firmly holding my hand.
"Director Fan, what are you kidding?" Don't you have a girlfriend yet?" I wanted to pull my hand out, but he squeezed it tighter.
His eyes darkened a little, and he said sadly, "We just broke up not long ago." She has gone abroad. Meng Lu, marry me, I will make you red!"
I was surprised. There is indeed love at first sight, but who proposes to someone the first time they meet? I said, "Director Fan, don't you joke with me?" "No, I'm serious!" He said stubbornly. "But there should always be a process, you don't know me, I don't know you.1" He said, "I already know you." As for me, you don't need to understand, what I want to do - I will do it!" He was smiling when he said that, but I felt a kind of manly domineering in him. Somewhere in my mind there was a sudden feeling of being conquered by his masculinity.
Romantic and domineering, boyfriend made me love and hate
From then on, I began to accept his dates. He chased me tightly. Under his manly appearance, he actually has a very romantic heart. For example, every night I get a pager message from him to me: "My baby, are you happy tonight?" Or "Baby, I miss you!" Wait a minute.
On my birthday in 2001, he invited me to dinner. During the meal, he took out a delicate box with a lizard butterfly knot and said, "This is a gift for your raw eyes; Open it and see!" I slowly opened the beautiful box and couldn't help but freeze, and the exquisite little card inside it said, "Dear baby, I'm sorry, I didn't grow up with you." Now let me make up the birthday gifts I've owed you for twenty years!" Then I saw the gifts of the 1-year-old in turn: bottle, nipple and creamer; Toy dolls at the age of 2; Animal album at the age of 3... There are also cute hairpins when you were 14 years old, lipstick when you were 18 years old, and so on. Wow! Such a pretense, thanks to him for thinking about it! At that moment, I was really touched!
In order to please me, he also relied on his relationship in the show business circle to introduce and recommend me to play a female peach who dared to love and dare to hate and dared to be bold in "Female Patrol". Under such a love offensive, my heart was intoxicated with some oblivion, as a girl who drifted from Xishuangbanna to Beijing and mixed in the film and television circle, I felt a kind of satisfaction and happiness with such a love for me. After that, he urged me to get married many times and told his friends that he was going to get married on May Day. Even though I love him too, I'm reluctant to get into the castle of marriage soon. So I smiled and said to him: "We have only known each other for such a short time, and we have not been in love enough, so why should we get married in a hurry?" I've heard that marriage is the graveyard of love!" He listened, and his face immediately darkened. Later, he asked me to move to him many times, and I declined. He was unhappy with my independence and stubbornness, and sometimes even argued with me about it.
I was actually slowly observing and getting to know him. Although he is a production director, I also want to take my career to a higher level through him, but I dare not give him the happiness of my life very easily, after all, lifelong events are not the same.
In August 2001, I filmed "The Red and the Black" in Zhejiang, playing the third aunt of the underworld boss of Shanghai Beach, Tai An Yu, a sexy and feminine special object. Fan Zhengtao seemed to be very uneasy about me, and he had to call me countless times a day and ask me who I was with and what I was doing. I joked with him, "Rest assured, what else do I dare to do besides filming?"
That day, after filming, I was taking pictures with several actors and actresses, and everyone was having a lot of fun, when suddenly, Fan Zhengtao appeared in front of me, his eyes were fierce, and he said coldly: "Follow me back!" I was surprised, he was in Beijing, how did he suddenly get here? I asked him what was wrong, and he still said with a black face, "I don't know what I'm doing?"
He dragged me back to the house and slammed me on the bed as soon as he entered the door. I got angry too, and I bounced off the bed and shouted, "What are you doing?" What are you crazy about?" Hmm, don't think it's okay to turn your back on me and others and I don't know! Tell you, you don't want to do anything behind my back!" He insisted that I was showing off my style, and one of the male actors in the play frowned, and I cried. I said, "What's the big deal about taking pictures with someone else?" Are you worth being jealous of?" When he saw me crying sadly, he came over and put his arms around me, giving me compensation while wiping my tears with a hand towel. He said, "Meng Lu, I'm not good. I was too impulsive. I love you too much, I must pay attention next time, okay?" Seeing that his attitude was so gentle, my heart softened and I forgave him.
However, this is just the beginning. I found that he was actually very domineering, he had to listen to him in everything, he said he wanted to do whatever he wanted, and he was more and more restrictive of me. Because I always play bad women, often have some bed scenes, he is very uncomfortable in his heart, suspects that I am naturally promiscuous, so he often argues with me and asks me to give up those roles. I said, thanks to the fact that you are still doing this line of work, you should understand better than others that acting and life are two different things. Although he did not speak for a while, he could see that his heart was very uncomfortable.
In 2001, I played the female monster Nine Sons Demon Mother in "QiTian Great Saint Sun Wukong". The characters in the play have nine ru rooms, which need to be undressed and plastered. That day Fan Zhengtao just came to pick me up. In the car, he said to me coldly: "Meng Lu, you let the crew choose another actor!" I hate you for playing a debauched bad woman!" I clearly told him that playing a bad woman may be my play, my strength, I can't give up, give up I am not the real me, my career is gone. He said, "It doesn't matter if you don't have a career, I'll raise you!" As long as you don't make eye contact with other men!" I was angry: "If so, then let's end it!" For me, career is the most important thing! You let me get out of the car and I'll go back myself!"
He suddenly released the steering wheel with both hands, and the car sped forward, only to see the building trees on both sides of the road falling backwards and backwards at a very fast speed. I was so frightened that my heart felt like it jumped to my throat. "Tao, drive the car quickly, there is something to say!" I screamed and pleaded with him. His face was dark and composed, and his hands were casually placed on his laps. The car is like a wild horse that has gone crazy without driving, still galloping forward at great speed. Fortunately, we were walking on a wide and straight highway, otherwise we would have crashed the car and killed people. "Tao, I beg you to drive the car slowly, life is a big thing!" I think I was already scared and bloodless. "Then do you still want to leave me?" He said in a trembling voice. "Actually, I don't want to leave you, you forced me." Looking at him like this, my heart was frightened and unspeakably moved.
Once again I was conquered by this particular way of loving him, and I cried with mixed emotions. He finally slowed down, holding the steering wheel with one hand and reaching over to me tightly. We reconciled again.
Surprised by the drug devil, the boyfriend is an addict
One day not long after, I went to look for him in his cottage in the Asian Games village. When I pulled out the key he had given me and opened the door, I was surprised to find him curled up on the couch taking drugs, and two famous film and television actors next to him were enjoying the same thing as him! When he saw me come in, he said angrily, "How did you get here?" I went up and grabbed his drugs, threw them on the ground, and said bitterly, "How can you do such a thing?"
He cried hysterically, "What's wrong with me? This is my freedom! How about I suck it?! I have money, I'm going to suck it!" He said he bent down to pick it up. I stomped on his bag of white powder with my foot and said angrily, "Don't you know that this is harming yourself?!" He suddenly raised his palm and slapped me hard in the face, and said viciously: "You stinky ladies, leave me alone!" Tell you what, chasing my pretty chick is more! You roll me!" I covered my fiery and painful face and looked at him in disbelief, tears gradually flowing out of my eyes. I cried out sadly, "Well, you go find another woman, I'll go!" After saying that, I rushed out of the door without looking back.
That day he made me see his domineering spirit more clearly, and there was a fierceness in the domineering spirit. I suddenly felt very uneasy. At night, I lost sleep. I have long heard that there are some people in the show business who take drugs, and I didn't expect him to be like this. What a terrible thing! Such a person does not say that he has been entrusted for life, but even being an ordinary friend is also frightening!
For the next few days, I really ignored him and didn't answer the phone when I saw that it was his phone number. He called me over and over again, saying, "I was wrong." I'll never do anything that makes you sad again. Where are you? Will I see you?" I had to call him back and I said, "Let's stop here!" There are a lot of girls chasing you, and picking one is better than me. However, I finally advise you to go to drug rehabilitation, because drug addiction will ruin your life. I sincerely wish you happiness. ”
One night a few days later, I had just returned to the rental house when Fan Zhengtao suddenly came, only to see that his eyes were a little red, his hair was disheveled, and his beard seemed to have not been shaved for several days. I said coldly, "Why are you here again?" Aren't we over?" He didn't say a word and held me tightly in his arms. "Let go of me, I'm going to shout!" I said as I struggled.
"Meng Lu, I really love you!" Accompany me to the drug rehab center! Only you can save me, and for your sake, I will definitely quit my addiction. He let go of me, a pair of eyes full of begging. He swore assurances over and over again, and signaled over and over again. Looking at him in pain, my heart trembled. After all, we have loved each other, can I not save him? I said, well, I'll give you one last chance, but you remember, detoxification is not for me, but for yourself! I accompanied him to the drug rehab center, and after settling him down, I went to the location. I called him every day, asked him questions, and encouraged him.
A week later, I returned to Beijing. I was going to see him and bring him some clothes by the way. When I pushed open his door, I was surprised to find that he had actually come home and was greedily taking drugs! When he saw me come in, he was stunned! He said bitterly, "Meng Lu, it's not that I don't want to quit, I really can't stand it!" Just let me suck it once!"
I stood there dumbfounded, tears welling up in my eyes! I suddenly realized that my charm was far from the power of drugs. A person who is addicted to drugs cannot be easily changed. Besides, his personality is still so domineering, can I have a good future with him? Thinking of this, I said coldly: "Fan Zhengtao, since this is the case, then let's break up!" Don't come to me again!" After saying that I slammed the door and left.
The ex-boyfriend almost became a shadow that could not be shaken off
A few days later I was filming on location when he showed up again. I was about to dodge when he came over and said, "Meng Lu, let's talk again!" We can't just leave it at that, can we?" I said, "There's nothing more to talk about." Unexpectedly, before the words could be heard, he pushed me down on the car, kissed me fiercely, and then his hands began to unsteadily peel my clothes.
He said, you are mine, and I will not let you marry someone else. I shouted loudly, and my girlfriend rushed to open the car door, and he let go. I got out of the car and fled back to my rental house.
That night, my phone kept ringing. Later, he changed a public telephone to call me, and he said fiercely on the phone: "Meng Lu, I tell you, what I can't get, others can't get it!" I will immediately get a group of underworld people to come and pour sulfuric acid on your face, I will cut out your eyeballs, I will make you disappear in the film and television circle!" I was so frightened that I quickly turned off my mobile phone.
Then my pager started ringing again, and the message he gave me was always the threatening words that preceded me. I was so scared I cried. I thought that avoidance was not the way to go, so I had to call him back. I said, "Brother Fan, you're doing this ridiculously. I don't think I deserve your big fuss, more than my beautiful people, a lot of people are waiting to be nice to you, and your future girlfriend will be a hundred times better than me. Is it necessary for you to pestering me? If something happens, it won't do you or me any good!" I tell you, I've called the police, and if something happens to me, you'll be caught very quickly. He said nothing and turned off his phone.
The next day, I received a call from a strange man: "Meng Lu, what is so great about you that you actually dumped my eldest brother?" Hurry up and say a few nice words to my eldest brother and come back to him!" I said, "Ask him what he did!" Can I be with such a person?, I don't think you are worth fighting for such a big brother!"
After a while, the assistant director of our crew also called me and said, "Meng Lu, reconcile with him!" He told me and said he loved you! Please tell him that I will not be good to him again. "In order to prevent him from harassing, I left the house the next day and rented another house in a different place. I was determined to sever ties with him once and for all.
A few days later, I was having dinner with a few people in the crew when he called again. The screenwriter Mr. Lui saw that my face was not right, asked me what was wrong, and I briefly told him. Mr. Lui took the phone and said, "Dude, you're not good at this!" If something comes to the Jade Dragon Hotel to find me, don't go through with a girl. After saying that, Mr. Lu turned off the phone. I was worried about it that day, but thankfully, he didn't actually come.
A month later, I got another call from him, and he seemed to have calmed down, saying, "Meng Lu, I've figured it out." Strong twisted melon is not sweet. However, we can still be friends" Come to me, I have a new TV series here, and there is a role that suits you very well. "I think they are all in the show business, maybe there will be a meeting in the future, it is not good to do things too much, so I said calmly: "Thank you, Brother Fan, I am out of town, I can't come back for a while, let's talk about it later!"
He never called again. I think I finally got rid of his entanglement.
Later, I reflected on the relationship with Fan Zhengtao, and I felt that from the beginning, he was confused by my sexiness. He was a bit domineering, and I mistook that character for a manly attitude. Also, subconsciously, I also want to rely on him to get more development in the show business, otherwise, how can I get along with him without much understanding? I think that in the future, I must accept the lesson, treat my feelings carefully, and rely on my true strength to fight for my own piece of the world! And this is the real place of my life journey.
(Excerpt from the collector's edition of "After Tea and Dinner")