One day, he picked a large bouquet of Gesang flowers and gave it to her, and she sniffed the smell of the flowers as if she were back in the sea of flowers at the bottom of the valley. As he climbed down to leave, he suddenly found a man standing in the shadow of the corner of the house, and the man was approaching him. He recognized it as her father, and looked at his angry gaze and clenched fists, the fear on his face gradually replaced by a kind of fortitude. His father stopped not far from him, and he began to pour out his admiration for her, and made it clear that if he could marry her, he would never leave the place, but would stay here and take care of her for the rest of his life. The father looked at the boy in front of him for a long time, and the anger in his eyes gradually faded, and these days he also saw his daughter's firm determination to love and re-thought about herself.
After a long time he said with a solemn expression, 'I can give you a chance, you left this place for three years, I will not marry her for three years, but you can no longer see her, nor can you have any contact with her.' If your relationship is still so reliable after three years, I will marry her to you. '
After listening to his father's words, he couldn't help but rejoice in his heart, but he also thought about how he had lived like a year after he had not seen her in just a few days, and how to survive for three years and not even be able to write a letter!
The father watched the expression on his face change from joy to worry, and then he said, 'You may consider it.' If you can't do that, don't come to me again, and nothing can stop her from getting married. ’
After saying this, his father turned away, leaving him standing in a daze, and he looked up at the window, which revealed an orange shimmer. He imagined in his mind that she was planting the Kelsang flowers in a vase on the table by the window, immersed in an illusory happiness, so close to him, yet so far away. When he got back, he lay in bed for a long time and couldn't sleep, his eyes staring straight at the ceiling, thinking about his father's words. Three years, why three years, if there is really three years of separation, how to endure the torment of thoughts, how to vent the surging emotions, and what is more frightening is that time will not let the thoughts fade, let the emotions fade, and what will happen in three years. He was suddenly filled with fear of the future, not outward but inward, his heart firm as a rock, but he had a premonition that under the erosion of time, even the hardest rock would gradually loosen, and finally he sadly realized that no love could be separated from the vacuum of three years, and time would send love to the grave.
Having said those words, the father stopped locking his sister up at home, and the sister went to him with joy, but saw the sadness between his brows. He told his sister what he said, and she began to grieve, 'Three years, why so long!' '
For people in love, three years is as long as a lifetime.
My sister asked, 'Is it possible to take a short time?' '
He shook his head and said, 'I can tell from your father's attitude that that's his bottom line.' '
Why did he do that? '
Maybe he's trying to tell us that no love can resist time. '
The sister looked at him silently, as if seeing some kind of rupture in his heart, and he was shaken not by their love, but by love itself.
They start dating again, dabbling every day in a mountain corner they've never been to before, as if they're going to exhaust all the feelings of love with a finite number of days. They never mentioned three years of separation again, and in his opinion, this choice was tantamount to losing love. As their sister's wedding date is approaching, an invisible pressure hangs over them, the sunset seems to be the end of the world, the Wild Gesang flowers bring the last revelry on the earth, the ghosts in the mountain wind are groaning and sighing, and there will be a pair of sad lovers in the world.
Finally, one day, my sister could no longer bear this torture, 'I can't be separated from you, and even thinking about it makes me unbearable.' '
I feel the same way, and I will never allow you to leave me. I've been thinking about it these days, the only way to get out of here, I've followed my father to many places where we can go and live and we'll be happy. '
My sister looked at him, her eyes gradually dimmed, and after a long time she shook her head, 'No one in our mountains has ever left, abandoned this mountain, this lake, I can't imagine love, I can't imagine life.' '
He looked into his sister's eyes, but there was an unshakable firmness in those gentle eyes, and he finally sighed and stopped trying to convince her, 'Then what should we do?' '
The sister did not speak, but her eyes were looking at the tree of martyrdom, and he suddenly understood her thoughts, and her intention in bringing him here was actually obvious enough, and his tone trembled, 'You mean to say...'
The sister interrupted him in a tone of extreme resentment, "It is said that the souls of martyred lovers will remain in this mountain and will never leave." I would rather be such a wandering soul, accompanying you day and night in this valley, eternal life and eternal life. '
He felt the deep infatuation in her words, and his heart was sighing and moving, and he took her in his arms, and his chest was full of love, and almost at the same time he made up his mind, for the sake of the beautiful vision of love that she believed in, or for the sake of that persistent thought, he was willing to give up his life.
Now that they have made this decision, the burden that has long weighed on them is gone, and love will no longer die in a way that they cannot accept. She became excited and obsessed, telling him poignant stories, intertwining life and love, confusing reality with the future, in order to resist the truest fears in the depths of her heart. For him, life became the sacrifice of love, and he marveled at the power of love and sighed for this illusory beauty.
They agreed on a date, and even prepared a knot, and the day before the agreed date, they strolled down the hillside, and the sunset was particularly brilliant, and it refused to fall, as if full of nostalgia for life, and they looked at each other affectionately. They no longer need words, they can catch each other's thoughts from one look, but he still said a word, 'I hope there is an afterlife, and we will be together in the next life!' '
I think it was this sentence that broke all her illusions, and she finally understood that what was about to usher in his heart was not the continuation of love, not the eternity of love, but the final end. She suddenly realized his affection, that he was using his life to satisfy one of her fantasies. She looked at him, the darkness in her eyes turned to a thick affection, and the obsessive gaze seemed to contain a sentiment that could not be dissipated by eternity and eternity. This time, immersed in love, he did not capture the bleakness that flashed in her eyes.
That night, she called me into her room and told me their story. In the process of narrating, she was sometimes incredibly excited, sometimes she was sobbing softly, and finally she calmed down. She told me that I must find my love, which is more important than life. She handed me a letter, and I asked her strangely why she didn't hand it to him, and when she said something, she couldn't bear to see him, and that was the last time I was their messenger. She was reluctant when I left, watching me in the hallway until I disappeared from her sight, and I never thought it would be the last time I would see her, while she was alive.
Early the next morning, I did not find my sister in the room, I went to the le shop to look for him, my sister was not there, and he had a sad calm on his face, as if nothing could make his mood fluctuate, but he was still surprised to see me.
He asked me where my sister was, and I told him, 'My sister went out early in the morning, and I thought she was here.' In addition, she asked me to forward a letter to you. '
He stared at the envelope in a daze, and NanNan said to himself, 'Why did you write to me today, and why did you ask you to send me a letter?' '
In the process of opening the letter, his hands trembled unconsciously, and it became more and more intense, and finally even his whole body trembled. Opening the letter, he calmed down, and there was a mysterious power in Juanxiu's handwriting that made people calm down. I watched him read the letter, and I watched his soul being sucked away little by little, and finally only an empty shell remained, and the enthusiasm and persistence that had once been gone away from him and never returned.
He slumped in his chair, still clutching the letter in his hand, as if clutching a life-saving straw. Suddenly, he jumped up from his chair and ran out the door, and I ran out after him, and he sped all the way through the town, over the hillside, and finally to the bottom of the valley full of Gesang flowers, and the tree of martyrdom still stood alone in a sea of flowers, only this time, there was an even more lonely figure hanging from the branches, and the skirt of the broken flowers swayed in the wind, as if it were a fairy dancing among the flowers, but she could no longer get rid of the tree, the tree that buried countless loves. He took her down and knelt down on the ground, tears gushing out, and I had never seen so many tears before, as if to bury this sea of flowers, buried in his tears, buried in his love.
I read the letter, and it said that she had broken her promise and didn't wait for him, because she wanted him to live, to live with their love, 'You are willing to give up your life to love me, but I am willing to use love to keep you alive.' You want to turn life into love, but I want to turn love into your life. Remember that as long as you live our love will not end, as long as I am still in this mountain, we will not stop loving you. I'm not saying goodbye because I'm sure we'll see each other again. '
In the time after his sister's death, he no longer appeared in the town, some people saw him sitting on his knees on the ridge, some people saw him walking alone in the mountain stream, and the sound of flutes often came from the mountains at night, far and near, mixed with the whimpering of the wind, as if the sadness in the song made countless ghosts cry.
One night, I couldn't bear the sadness of the song, and I followed the sound, the flute was intermittent, and I was constantly searching for its source, and finally I saw the familiar figure in the moonlight on a hillside. I shouted his name from a distance, he trembled and turned to look at me, I approached to see his eyes full of tears, just when I wanted to speak, he suddenly opened his arms and held me in his arms, I was startled and wanted to break free, but I heard him whispering my sister's name in my ear, somehow, my heart softened, no longer struggling, let him hold tightly. After a long time he finally released his arm and looked at me sheepishly, as if gradually recognizing me, and his hot eyes dimmed. He sat down on the ground, and I sat down next to him, and he apologized for the disrespect he had just done.
I shook my head and said, 'I know you miss your sister, and I miss her too.' '
He poured out to me, 'You know what? I regret that her father had given me a choice to leave her for three years, and if I still loved her after three years, I could marry her, and I missed that option. I had thought that the relationship that had been separated for three years would fade, but I was wrong. I now understand that some feelings cannot fade in a lifetime, let alone only for three short years. '
At that time they had just recovered from the bitter torment of longing, three years was like a life for them, and now he knew in his heart that he was destined to survive this life in thought and regret, but three years was very short.
I comforted him, 'Maybe my father is just a stopgap measure, he doesn't want to marry his sister to you, that just makes you retreat.' '
If this is the case, then I have retreated in the face of difficulties, and if I had faced them at that time, this would not have been the end. I had decided to die with her, but she wanted me to live alone, and what was the point of living without her! '
I looked at him disheartened and felt very sad, 'She wants you to live with her love, not to make you depressed by the thought of her all the time, but to let her love be integrated into your future life.' You don't forget her, but more importantly, you have to live well, and that's what she wants to see. '
He looked at his feet dully, as if he hadn't heard my words, and I knew that the sadness in his heart could not be dispelled by words, so I stopped talking and just silently accompanied him. After a while, he began to recall the past, 'I used to wander in the mountains at night and play the bamboo flute like I am now, but at that time I knew where she was, knew that she could hear my songs, felt my heart, and the thoughts at that time were rooted, full, and in retrospect, the feeling of being missed and burned was so happy.' And now, thoughts are like fragments floating in the air, unable to be continuous, and what interrupts it is despair from the bottom of the heart. Even the song could not be blown, and when it was blown halfway, it lost all its strength, as if life had come to an abrupt end, and when it recovered, only the empty echo remained. ’
Then the next time you try to finish the song, maybe she can hear it, and if she can, she wants to hear your tenderness and love, not sadness and pain, isn't it? '
He nodded slowly, looking at the deep mountains in the distance, 'I'm sure she can hear it.' '
Since then, he has still wandered in the mountains, and I have gone to the mountains every day to look for him, sometimes to the sound of the flute, sometimes to the old places, most of the time I can find him, but sometimes I can't find him, maybe it's because he hides and doesn't want to see me. I always accompanied him in silence, and he would sometimes talk to me about my sister, and sometimes fall into a long silence.
It was a long, long time, and one day he suddenly said to me, 'Thank you for being with me all these days, but I'm a dead heart, and being with me all the time will have a bad impact on you.' '
I was amazed that he never said these words to me, 'Why do you say that?' ’
You have to find someone you love and he loves you, and be brave enough to pursue love, not like us, not in our way. '
But love is not something that can be found by deliberate searching, it always meets unexpectedly, and even before you know it, it is already deeply involved. The next day I went to the mountains again, but I could no longer find him, and I ran around the mountains, searching every valley and every mountain beam, but in the end I found nothing, only the whistling wind echoing in the mountains. This remained the case for the next few days, and I gradually understood in my heart that he would not come again. The night was quiet again, there was no more flute sounding, and I hadn't heard a flute since that day. I went to Lepu to look for him, and sure enough, he had left here, and there was nothing left, so he left like this, and he never came back, and I didn't know about him until today, and it turned out that he had been dead for so many years. ”
As she spoke, there was a long-lost tenderness in her eyes, and when she finished, the tenderness gradually dissipated, as if it were gone with distant memories. She mechanically fiddled with the tea set, and her eyes became hollow again.
Zi Hao was immersed in her narration and was silent for a long time.
Tinglan sighed, as if she was also sighing for this miserable love.
Yuko broke the silence and asked, "Have you been waiting for him?" ”
Her hand fiddling with the tea set suddenly trembled, and she looked up at him, her eyes becoming hot as fire in an instant, "Yes, I have been waiting for him, and I am sure he will come back." After he left, I continued to search the mountains, and although I knew it was in vain, I kept searching. My heart was empty and lost, and only in search could this emotion be alleviated, and I remembered the days when I was silently with him, and I couldn't help but wonder why I had only now realized the extraordinary meaning of those countless ordinary days. If I had realized this then, I would have treated every day as my last day and every parting as a farewell.
Seeking is nothing more than a nostalgia for the past, a remembrance of a love that has not yet come and ended. In the long years, I have not stopped looking, but what I find is always disappointment, and as time goes on, the disappointment gradually shifts to the search for the matter itself, so that my life is filled with disappointment and can no longer come out.
I have come more than once to the valley where the tree of martyrdom is located, and the flowers in the valley are nourished by the love of the past, and they are blooming more and more, and there are still a few messy stones under the tree. I seemed to see my sister wrapping a rope around her neck, and I couldn't help but wonder if what she had in mind was the sadness of the loss of life or the joy of unreserved devotion to love. I thought about him again, what kind of life he had lived after he left, whether he had forgotten that his sister had returned to a peaceful life, or whether he had spent his broken life with regret in his heart.
In the midst of my wild thoughts, a voice sounded in my ears, life is nothing more than this, love is nothing more than this, once it is gone, all that remains is regret and pain. I looked at the tree and knew that it was tempting me, whether it was through illusory beauty or real pain, it had only one purpose, it buried my sister, buried her love, and buried my love at the same time. I looked at it for a long time, at the deep scratches on the branches, where a tragic story was carved. I remembered again what he said, to pursue your own love, not to be like them, not to use their ways. Suddenly I made a decision in my mind, I went home and took a long axe and went straight to its trunk, I kept cutting it, and when I was tired, I rested, and when I rested, I continued to cut, and finally it was shaking. When I cut down the last axe, it fell slowly, the branches rustled in the wind, as if countless groans, and I cut off the last traces of countless lost loves. ”
Tinglan cried out in surprise, "So that tree of martyrdom is no longer there?" ”
Although the tree is gone, but the martyrdom has not disappeared, I later figured out that martyrdom does not stem from external obstacles, but from love lost, it sinks deeper and deeper in the mood of attachment, and finally reaches the state of being unable to extricate itself." But isn't its intoxicating beauty also stem from these persistent and stubborn emotions? ”
Yuzi said, "Martyrdom stems from despair of love, especially the despair of not being able to keep each other, but love does not have to be together. I know a record store owner who spent his life waiting for someone he could never wait for, but he never despaired because that waiting was love in itself. ”
She said calmly, "The man who can never wait, he is luckier than me, because he knows this, and I am just wandering in this small building, with a glimmer of illusory hope." Later, my parents arranged a marriage for me, but I insisted on refusing, with the precedent of my sister, they did not dare to push too hard, and in the end they only sighed, maybe there are daughters like us, it is also a kind of sadness for them. Later, I moved to this small building to protect the lovers who had passed away. ”
After a while, she looked at Zi Zhen again and asked, "What kind of person is your mother?" ”
Zi Zhen said, "My mother is a very kind and gentle person, and later she jumped into the sea because of her father's accident, and she took the flute with her when she jumped into the sea." ”
She turned her gaze to the table and sighed, "Is this the end of the people he loves?" ”
"But I know that moms don't regret it, and your sister won't regret it, no matter what they think, they're people who are willing to give up their lives for love."
She nodded slowly and did not speak again.