Zhang Xiaoxian said: The saddest kind of breakup is not a vigorous quarrel between the two sides, not a big fight, not a party to empathize with other love, nor is it that everyone cannot be combined, and the saddest breakup is a silent breakup.
This sentence is well applied to the couple of Fang Yinuo and Xiao Lu in the TV series "Dear Child".
Details beat love
At the beginning, Fang Yinuo (played by Ren Suxi) insisted on marrying Xiao Lu (played by Qin Hao) who was from a general family in spite of the strong opposition of his mother (played by Yue Hong).
Life after marriage can also be regarded as stable and plain. Husband Xiao Lu is responsible for earning money to support the family, and wife Fang Yinuo is responsible for teaching and educating people.
The birth of his daughter Hehe completely broke the peace of this small family.
First of all, Let's talk about Fang Yinuo, in the matter of giving birth to a child, she is indeed a hero of the in-laws' family. As a teacher, after giving birth to a child, Fang Yinuo did have a place of pretense.
There are 4 details that can be seen. First, taking the baby to get a preventive injection, Fang Yinuo actually let his mother and husband follow. Originally, the place where the preventive injection was given was small, in fact, at most two adults could go, and there was no need for three adults to follow.
Second, when her daughter was given a preventive injection, Fang Yinuo' mother actually fainted from the injection. This mother does have a little pretentiousness, as a mother, isn't it stronger at this time?
Third, the baby has a fever, and the first time she is to go to the hospital. At this time, shouldn't you first take the body temperature to measure the body temperature, and then do physical cooling at home first? If you have a high fever, do you take anti-fever medicine at home and then go to the hospital?
How could he let his mother hold the baby on a rainy night and finally fall. If you don't have to, you can call a friend to help.
Fourth, as a daughter-in-law, the mother-in-law came to help take care of the confinement, she picked and chose, and did not have a little gratitude to the mother-in-law.
Let's look at Xiao Lu again. At the time of the birth of the child, Xiao Lu's biggest mistake was to carry the placenta to his mother on his wife's back, and to sleep at home when his wife gave birth.
His wife gave birth in the hospital, and he was able to sleep at home.
Xiao Lu's advantage is that he has always tried to balance the relationships of everyone in this family, and he will also ask for warmth during his wife's pregnancy.
After the birth of the child, he is basically at home, more of an escape.
Xiao Lu would rather be in the car than go home, because he felt that no one at home cared about him, and he was tired after a day of work and did not want to take the children.
After the birth of the child, Xiao Lu and his wife Fang Yinuo's feelings became weaker and weaker, like friends who shared a house. A year after giving birth, Fang Yinuo was still unwilling to fulfill his wife's obligations.
Flies don't stare at seamless eggs. Xiao Lu's world walked into a girl Zhu Zhu.
The arrival of Zhu Zhu stirred up a ripple in Xiao Lu's original married life like stagnant water.
When he was with Zhu Zhu, Xiao Lu was relaxed and happy, as if he had found the feeling of being in love.
Xiao Lu and his wife Fang Yinuo were eating breakfast, but they thought about the picture of being happy with Zhu Zhu. If this is a spiritual derailment, then Xiao Lu stripped naked and lay on Zhu Zhu's bed, then it is a real hammer of derailment.
Mother-in-law and mother-in-law react very differently
The husband cheated, and the mother-in-law and the mother-in-law reacted very differently.
Like Fang Yinuo's mother. Fang's mother is a delicate egoist, who has always looked down on the family, including the son-in-law, and has always believed that her daughter is married.
Not only that, Fang Mu also does not respect people, and usually lives a picky life. Xiao Lu can tolerate 1 year, in fact, he can also be regarded as loving his wife.
After learning that her son-in-law had cheated, as a mother-in-law, she did not stand in an objective point of view to persuade, but poured fuel on the fire, let the two divorce, and let her daughter find a better man.
Compared with her mother-in-law, although her mother-in-law Gao Caiping has a big grin and can smoke and love to play cards, she is a kind and reasonable elder. For example, she will change her bad smoking habits to integrate into the family, she has been trying to change herself, unlike her own mother, who has been showing me and trying to change others.
After learning that her son cheated on her, her mother-in-law also had a very normal three views. She did not favor her son Xiao Lu, but instead scolded Xiao Lu, and also went to account for Xiao San, and let her son and Xiao San cut off contact in person.
She has always been in the position of her daughter-in-law. She hopes that her son and daughter-in-law can continue to run the marriage well.
In the matter of Xiao Lu's derailment, Fang Yinuo's mother-in-law was obviously much better than her mother's handling.
Is Xiao Lu really cheating?
How to define infidelity? There are two kinds of infidelity, one is spiritual derailment, and the other is physical derailment.
Xiao Lu did have a mental derailment, which was a foregone conclusion. When Zhu Zhu asked him if he liked her, Xiao Lu did not deny it, but said that it was impossible. He must have been mentally derailed.
Regarding physical infidelity, this is a little vague.
Xiao Lu was drunk and went home with Zhu Zhu. When he woke up, Xiao Lu was lying naked on Zhu Zhu's bed.
The details are not reflected in the TV series. In real life, a man is drunk and generally cannot physically cheat.
So why did Zhu Zhu take a picture? Here we want to talk about the growth environment of Zhu Zhu, a girl. Zhu Zhu's mother is a strong woman, and her father divorced because of cheating when she was very young.
In a family that lacks fatherly love, the mother is strong and domineering. Zhu Zhu's psychology is a little twisted, she longs for love and freedom, and wants to find a man who is good to her.
In fact, Zhu Zhu's mother loves her daughter very much, and she hates the third party very much. This is also why when she heard her daughter become a junior, her reaction would be so fierce.
Zhu's mother's love for her daughter is very deep, but it has also become a spiritual shackle, resulting in Zhu Zhu's repression and rebellion.
Under the high-pressure education of her mother, Zhu Zhu is a well-behaved and obedient girl with no opinion. In her opinion, disobeying her mother is a big thing.
Therefore, for the sake of Xiao Lu, she and her mother fell out. She was going to hold Xiao Lu responsible. There was also a big fuss About Fang Yinuo's daughter's birthday party.
Zhu Zhu, a rich woman, did not even want a little decency and bottom line. Because her world collapsed.
Under Zhu Zhu's big fuss, the decent Fang Yinuo's reaction was also very indifferent. Indifference is more with a hint of disappointment and sadness.
How could she not have imagined that her husband would cheat?
So did Fang Yinuo wrongfully accuse Xiao Lu? It can be seen from the play that Xiao Lu woke up naked, which does not mean that his flesh has derailed.
It is very likely that Xiao Lu did not have a relationship with Zhu Zhu that night, but Zhu Zhu's wishful thinking took a photo. Then whether he has wronged Xiao Lu, he may not have physically cheated.
Even if there is no physical derailment, Xiao Lu can be regarded as a spiritual derailment. Decent as Fang Yinuo, she will definitely choose divorce. She also gave Xiao Lu enough face, and did not collapse in public, but chose to decisively and simply hold the child and leave.
In this broken marriage relationship, in fact, Fang Yinuo and Xiao Lu have to bear certain responsibilities.
Fang Yinuo has a teacher's occupational disease and a little postpartum depression. A year after giving birth, she is still lukewarm to her husband, and she is indeed not a very considerate wife.
Xiao Lu liked to escape and thin mud, and did not take on the responsibility of his father. In the most difficult time for his wife, he did not give tolerance and understanding, but cheated. It's all his fault.
It can only be said that one slap does not make a sound.
A problem with a marriage is definitely not a one-sided problem.
Two people who obviously have love have fallen apart in this way. Xiao Lu also wanted to save the marriage. Fang Yinuo chose to end this marriage.
To end with Zhang Xiaoxian's words: The person who is willing to give up what he has together first is the one who loves more deeply among the two people.