If you say that from the three women in "The World" - Zheng Juan, Hao Dongmei, zhou Rong, choose one to be the other half, how will you choose?
Some people say that Dongmei knows dali, but lacks interest; Zhou Rong is romantic and amorous, but too self-sufficient;
And Zheng Juan, whether on the outside or inside, satisfies the fantasies of all men.
Even Liang Xiaosheng, the original author of "The World of Man", praised her:
"There is a type of woman who is an angel sent by God to the people, and as long as they have an intimate relationship with any family, that family will flourish."
But this Zheng Juan, who all the men on the Internet wanted to marry, followed Zhou Bingkun with a dead heart.
Wind and rain in the same boat, no complaints and no regrets, let people see the most beautiful appearance of marriage.
Why?
A man's sense of proportion
It's a woman's sense of security
When it comes to marriage, many people will feel that husband and wife should trust each other, and feel that the minimum trust given to each other is the basis of love.
But the premise of maintaining trust is that you will maintain a sense of boundaries and proportions of the opposite sex other than your partner.
Talking only about trust, not boundaries, is rogue thinking.
Zhou Bingkun did a good job of this.
If Zhou Bingkun at the beginning was not enlightened, he would not understand the style like wood when Qiao Chunyan of the Green Plum Bamboo Horse stirred up everything.
Then later, in the face of Sun Xiaoning's pursuit, Zhou Bingkun undoubtedly showed the responsibility of a mature man.
You know, at that time, Zhou Bingkun was considered to be "successful in his career", not only had a wide hand, but also the compilation of a magazine.
Coupled with the fact that zheng juan has been married for many years, this kind of stall is exactly the time when men are most likely to think of "desertion".
This spell, even the most upright Zhou Bingyi, can not be exempted from vulgarity, the spirit of cheating on a foreign woman, so that the mother-in-law grabbed the braid and warned "wipe the gun and do not go away".
However, in front of the young and beautiful Sun Xiaoning, Zhou Bingkun kept his bottom line and clearly told Sun Xiaoning:
"She (Zheng Juan) is the pillar of our family, the main bone in my heart, you said that if your sister-in-law didn't want me, you said that there was no place to cry."
I have seen a sentence: knowing how to reject ambiguous signals from other women is a sign of a man's maturity in love.
Indeed, when Li Xiang and Wang Yuelun divorced, the netizens' reactions were "finally gone".
As we all know, in their marriage, there is a shadow that has always existed, that is, Wang Yuelun has been repeatedly photographed as a secret beauty.
Every time, it was Li Xiang who stood up for Wang Yuelun.
At that time, the sentence "A friend's girlfriend can't ride in my car" made many people think that Li Xiang was overreacting and making a fuss.
But if it weren't for Wang Yuelun's lack of a basic sense of boundaries, Li Xiang wouldn't have cleaned up the mess for Wang Yuelun every time.
Men and women, especially married men, should maintain a clearer distance from the opposite sex.
The appropriate sense of boundaries and proportions is not a fuss, but a minimum respect for the other half.
Because your sense of proportion is the sense of security of the other half.
Happy marriage
The relationship between husband and wife is always the first
If a married man is still obedient to his parents, obedient, and even wronged his wife when he is married, will he be a good man?
Such men, in fact, are not uncommon, and have always been "ratings codes" in film and television dramas.
Their common sentence patterns are:
"It's not easy for my father and my mother to bring me up, so you can bear with me for my sake."
"It's all a family, they're old, can't you just let it go?"
For example, Su Mingzhe in "All Is Good", without communicating with his wife, took it upon himself to buy a three-bedroom and one-room set for his father Su Daqiang, and it was still full.
In the face of his wife's questioning, he also righteously said: "I hope my father has a good life, is this wrong?" ”
There is also YaPing in "Double Sided Tape", every time Li Juan and her mother-in-law have a dispute, Ya Ping will use evasion, or cold violence to force Li Juan to be soft, and finally evolve into a rough move against Li Juan.
But in a happy marriage, the relationship between husband and wife is always the first, and only when the relationship between husband and wife is stable, the family will be stable.
Zhou Bingkun was like this to Zheng Juan.
Zhou Bingkun in "The World" has been looking forward to getting the admired eyes of his parents all his life, and making his parents satisfied is almost his obsession in life.
But even so, he did not become the "echo worm" of his parents.
The father heard that he was going to marry a woman who was unmarried and pregnant with someone else's child, and kicked him down with a leg, but he did not give in;
His mother set a trap to let him and Qiao Chunyan cook mature rice with raw rice, but he resolutely refused to follow;
The most rare thing is that if you want to get Zheng Juan, you may "draw cakes" and wrap love with sweet words, in short, first deceive people and then say.
When you get married, even if you find that you have been deceived and suffered a big loss, it is too late to regret it.
But Zhou Bingkun did not.
He did not use the so-called promise to fish Zheng Juan, but used actions to prove his affection.
Even in front of Zheng Juan's son, he did not hide his "preference" for Zheng Juan.
Therefore, some people will say that a woman like Zheng Juan is rare, and a man like Zhou Bingkun is even more rare.
Although zheng juan was bitter in the first half of her life, when she met a man like Zhou Bingkun, they could chew up the bitterness of life and smile at any suffering with a smile.
The nature of marriage
It is a value exchange between two people
There is an old saying called "one day husband and wife 100 days of grace".
Many times, in Chinese marriages, we don't talk about love, but about grace.
Compared with the warm romance of love, grace is more durable.
Zhou Bingkun and Zheng Juan's marriage confirms this.
Compared with the eldest brother Zhou Bingyi, who was the head of the market, and the second sister Zhou Rong, who was a university professor, Zhou Bingkun was always the least successful at home.
Seeing Tu Zhiqiang being shot would faint and have nightmares; when he heard that his sister and brother-in-law had an accident, he would cry out emotionally.
He was timid, honest and cowardly, as if imprinted on his face.
But a woman, especially a beautiful woman, encounters misfortune enough to inspire a man's dream of salvation and hero complex.
Zhou Bingkun and Zheng Juan's first encounter coincided with Zheng Juan's most depressed time.
Here in Zheng Juan, Zhou Bingkun can feel that he is needed.
He was willing to lend her a helping hand, even disobeying his parents.
Zhou Bingkun's efforts, Zheng Juan are all in the eyes, so she will stand up when the Zhou family is in trouble, with a blind man, an unmarried son, in all kinds of rumors, for Zhou Bingkun to guard a complete home.
Some people say that the reason why Zhou Bingkun and Zheng Juan can live together is because they are both good people.
But in life, we have seen too many, two good people's marriages, and finally parted ways.
Because getting along with good people is like wearing the most comfortable shoes, there is no feeling.
You tend to forget that the person around you who gives and takes is also a living person with ideas and desires.
Good people can't see their value to their other half in marriage, and they can't express their needs calmly.
For example, kenuchi-style wives sacrifice their youth for the family and pay for their careers, but they are usually unhappy, and the relationship between husband and wife will gradually drift apart.
Largely because they have a sense of giving and sacrifice in their marriage, but they are not recognized by their other half.
The essence of love is emotional exchange, while the essence of marriage is value exchange.
The value here is not exactly money and material, but also includes added value such as ability and emotional value.
What is paid unilaterally is not love, but sacrifice and worship, just like Zhou Rong and Feng Huacheng.
Only by running in both directions and supporting each other can we move forward side by side.
Murong Xi once said:
"Marriage is not only two people facing each other from now on, marriage should be two people holding hands and facing the world together."
What exactly is the meaning of a partner?
I remembered a test question I had done a long time ago.
Suppose you find the following five animals in the primeval forest:
Tigers, dogs, elephants, peacocks, monkeys, but you can't take them all out of the forest, you can only give up one by one, and finally one is left, so who will you choose to take out of the forest?
Of these five animals, the peacock is almost the first one that many people give up.
Because it looks the weakest and most useless.
But the meaning behind them makes people think deeply:
Tigers represent money and career, dogs represent friends, elephants represent parents, peacocks represent partners, and monkeys represent children.
What you choose, it means what kind of life you choose.
Therefore, some people say that it is precisely because the peacock is weak that we need to be firmly chosen, and we will be full of strength because we have something firmly guarded.
Yes, the partner is sometimes a weak rib, sometimes also an armor.
The siege of marriage is also full of undercurrents, but there will also be shining moments of solidarity.
How should I choose a partner? How to make the right choices at key moments in life? How do you survive a crisis in your marriage? These are very important propositions in our lives.
I believe that many people who do not know how to repair it after the return of betrayal have the same feelings.
"My husband is back, but we are always cautious in communicating, which is like living a life?"
"I wanted to be close to him, but I thought he was dirty, and my heart could not reach that hurdle."
"Saying that he is returning to the family, in fact, he just lives at home, does not leave and continues, will still contact Xiao San when he has the opportunity, and at most accompany the child after returning, and I am still so cold."
"Just after the embarrassing period, the first two days because of an incident quarreled, and now the relationship is back to the original shape ..."
According to statistics, after the discovery of betrayal, 65% of people will eventually choose divorce, and after intervention, this number can drop to 2%. If you are experiencing similar problems and do not know how to solve them, you can put the details @ Heart Help Lu Yue Private message me, I will help you.
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