When a son gets married, should parents buy a house for their son? For this question, I also asked some elderly people around me, and their answers were surprisingly consistent: Of course, to buy a house for my son, I will struggle all my life, that is, I hope that my son will get married and have children, and my own money is also prepared for my son.
Aunt Wu also thought so at first, Aunt Wu felt that before her son got married, she had to buy a house for her son no matter what, otherwise the daughter-in-law and the daughter-in-law's mother-in-law's family would not agree, so before the son got married, Aunt Wu and her wife took out their life's savings, borrowed a lot of money from relatives, and finally bought a small two-bedroom for her son in full.
After buying a good house, Aunt Wu clenched her teeth and raised money, and did not hesitate to let the daughter of the work take out her savings to decorate the marriage room for her son, and finally waited until the son got married smoothly, Aunt Wu finally breathed a sigh of relief, waiting for the son to get married and have children, she and her wife went to bring grandchildren to her son and daughter-in-law.
However, when the grandson was born, the daughter-in-law did not let Aunt Wu take the grandson in the past, but let her own mother come to have children, and then the daughter-in-law's parents all lived together.
First, the 66-year-old sighed: I really should not buy a house for my son in full
After Aunt Wu's son got married and had children, within a few years, the daughter-in-law felt that this marriage room was too small, so she proposed to change a large house, and the son did not discuss with Aunt Wu, and directly sold it to buy a set of three rooms, the daughter-in-law said that the child should sleep in a room when he was older, and his parents would sleep in a room, so he had to buy three rooms.
In this regard, although Aunt Wu did not say anything on her lips, she could see that she was very sad, because she used her life savings to buy a house for her son, and she also had a lot of debts for this, but she and her wife had not lived once, and her son and daughter-in-law did not say hello, and directly sold the house.
The most important thing is that the name of the son is written on the small house, and the name of the son and daughter-in-law is written on the new house, and the house has nothing to do with Aunt Wu and his wife.
Seeing that she is old and has to carry hundreds of thousands of debts, Aunt Wu is sullen all day, and when she chats, she will also reveal a point of view: she really should not have given her son a full house in the first place!
After listening to Aunt Wu's words, many parents agreed with this, feeling that unless the woman specifically asked, try not to buy a house for her son in full, at most pay a down payment, and let the son and future daughter-in-law bear it themselves.
In fact, Aunt Wu's daughter did not work for several years, because she saw that her parents were not worried about the money in order to buy a marriage house for her brother, so when her mother proposed to let her take out her savings to help her brother, she took it out.
As a result, up to now, this money Aunt Wu is not able to return to her daughter, the key is that the son and daughter-in-law earn money and do not help Aunt Wu they also borrow some money, just with the little pension of Aunt Wu and his wife can not save much money, and it is not easy to find it when they are older and want to do odd jobs.
Second, after buying a house for his son in full, the 3-point feeling of the elderly has aroused the consensus of many elderly people
Speaking of buying a marriage house for their son in full, some parents agree, feeling that if there is a condition, they will buy a house for their son in full, so that the son's life is not stressful, and some parents even if they pay their son a down payment to buy a house, the monthly payment does not let the son out, but bears the monthly payment.
However, such a result is often that the elderly are overwhelmed, the economic pressure is very large, and when they should enjoy their old age in peace, they do odd jobs everywhere because of huge economic pressure, and their lives are also frugal.
Therefore, Aunt Wu issued a lot of feelings because she advocated buying a house for her son at that time, specifically, there are three main feelings:
(1) Economic pressure is high, and life in later life is not satisfactory
Generally speaking, if parents buy a house for their son in full, it is a big expense, even if you buy a very small house in a second- or third-tier city, it will cost millions, if it is not a family with good economic conditions, it is difficult to bear this economic pressure.
Aunt Wu's son lived in a third-tier city, when she and her wife bought a small two-bedroom set of more than 70 square meters for her son, according to the house price at that time, a house would be more than 1 million.
Aunt Wu and her wife are old workers, the pension after retirement is not high, plus for the two children to go to college, a lifetime of savings have been used to buy a house for their son, and also borrowed a lot of money, even the daughter's money saved after work has been lent out to buy a house.
However, after the son got married, his income was handed over to his daughter-in-law, so he did not help Aunt Wu to borrow money at all, so that every year when he went to relatives, Aunt Wu was embarrassed to say that the borrowed money was slowly repaid.
Because of the economic pressure, Aunt Wu and her wife live very economically, in addition to the daughter to buy them clothes, Aunt Wu is not willing to buy herself a new dress, every day to save money.
(2) Sons and daughters-in-law are not necessarily grateful
Although parents do not expect their children to be grateful for their efforts, parents use their life savings to buy a house for their son in full, originally out of good intentions, want their son to marry and have not so much economic pressure, but if you buy a house in full, the average family can only buy a small apartment.
In this way, after the son gets married and has children, if the old man uses to live with the child, the house will appear too small and the space is small, and at this time, the daughter-in-law will inevitably dislike the house she bought is too small, so she has the idea of selling the small house and changing the big house.
The reason why many parents buy a house for their son before marriage is because buying a house before marriage is their son's premarital property, so that in case something changes later, the son will not have so much economic loss.
However, if you sell a small house to buy a big house after marriage, and your son and daughter-in-law each account for half of the property after marriage, many elderly people will inevitably feel uncomfortable.
(3) After buying a house in full, the son is generous, does not know how to be frugal, and is not even in a hurry to get married
After buying a house in full, the son has no pressure to buy a house, plus young people are extravagant in consumption, so if there is no monthly payment pressure and no understanding of parents, they will earn how much to spend.
There are a few such parents around me, and they have the full amount to buy a house for their son before marriage, so that his son does not have any financial pressure.
The most important thing is that after having a house, the son is not in a hurry to get married, and he feels that he is living a very comfortable life like this, and no one cares about himself.
All in all, families who buy houses for their sons in full will generally be like Aunt Wu, and they will send out some feelings in their hearts, which should be powerless and stressful, and the happiness index of later life will be reduced.
III. Conclusion
On the Internet, we can often see that the parents of the adopted daughter regret buying a house for their daughter, because they bought a house for their daughter, the daughter is not in a hurry to find a boyfriend, not in a hurry to get married; and the parents of the adopted son regret that they bought a house for their son in full, because the economic pressure is too great, they pay everything, maybe the daughter-in-law does not appreciate it, and even the elderly have not been able to live in the house.
This is because a lot of full money to buy a house for the son, the son has his own house once he wants to get married, some women will propose to either sell the house to buy a big house, write their own name, or add their own name to the property certificate before marriage, etc., there are many things.
Just like Aunt Wu is like this, she worked hard to buy a house for her son, and before she got married for a day, she was bought by her son and daughter-in-law to buy a new house, and it was the daughter-in-law's parents who lived in the new house.
Therefore, many parents suggest that the son has the ability to pay a down payment to buy a house by himself, and then pay his own monthly payment, and the parents can properly help him, and make a down payment, so that the old man's later life will not be affected by buying a house for his son.
Will you buy a house for your son in full?