People conform to the environment, but often end up becoming slaves to the environment. "If you want to be a real 'person', you must first be a person who does not blindly follow the cause. The integrity of your mind is inviolable... When I abandon my position and want to see something from the point of view of others, the mistake is created..." This is the famous quote of Ralph Wado Emerson, who is the least blind of all. The true self is precious, we should always maintain our judgment, blind obedience is equal to no choice.
Perhaps, we can interpret Emerson's words as follows: "See things from the point of view of others as much as possible—but not lose your own point of view because of it." "If maturity can do you any good, it's discovering your beliefs and the courage to realize them— whatever the factors.
Young people or people who are not deeply involved in the world are often afraid of being different... Whether it's dressing, acting, talking, or thinking, try to be consistent with other people in your circle. Kids like to do the same thing as people their age, and they care what their friends or playmates think of them. They need to be accepted by their own companions–this is the most important evidence of his existence. When we are in an unfamiliar environment and have no past experience to refer to, the best way to do this is to conform to the standards of ordinary people — until our own experience and confidence are enough to give us strength, and then we can do what we believe and do.
But even the basic principles have their moments of being tested. In particular, some people who do not follow the trend will propose reforms – this is the driving force for the progress of civilization.
It's not easy to avoid going with the flow, at least not happily. Sometimes, there is even danger. Most people prefer to adapt to the environment, hide in crowds for protection, and have no doubt or objection to the leadership of various rulers – they dare not do anything different. However, they do not realize that this security is actually hypocritical. The public psychology is actually the most fragile, and it is easiest to be led by the nose. Like the pursuit of security, people conform to the environment and often end up becoming slaves to the environment.
In fact, many people in life have not thought independently and autonomously when they are sixteen or seventeen years old. Since then, although I have become a little more aware of thinking, all I think is trivial. Just absorbing the content of the book read in a hurry, and blindly accepting what friends say, without considering whether it is correct or not. Instead of going to great lengths to pursue what really matters, it is better to go with the flow, which is why many people are too lazy to think. In this way, when you find yourself with judgment, you have been misled by prejudice. Although he is not aware of it, he has developed a false habit of thinking, which has replaced the pursuit of truth. "If only I had started judging myself sooner!" This is the exclamation of many people after reaching a certain age. To avoid future regrets, it's best to start early. Of course, human judgment cannot always be correct, and there are occasional times when there are mistakes. However, taking the least number of mistakes as the pointer is the same method. What can make up for this mistake is to read books and interact with people. However, you can't trust these two too much and swallow dates. For, after all, these two are only the supplement of the judgment given by God. Good judgment mainly comes from people's independent and in-depth thinking ability.
When a person is determined to think for himself and start experimenting, the way he thinks about things changes dramatically. In contrast to the past when we looked at things with ideas taught by others, and when abstract illusions were mistaken for real things, our views on everything now seem orderly.
For the idea that pops up in your head, first re-evaluate whether it is really your opinion. Although it takes a long time, it is worth it to get into the habit of thinking things carefully with your own mind. First of all, you have to review your current thoughts one by one, think about it, do you really think that way, or do you think according to what others tell you? Could it be prejudice or wrong belief? Let's start with these questions! If there is no prejudice, young people should use their minds to listen to the opinions of various people, think about whether it is right or wrong, or what is wrong, and then synthesize various opinions and summarize their own views.
Others argue that those who don't go with the flow are usually eccentric personalities, who like to sensationalize or like to flaunt "different". In this regard, Emerson's firm position has always earned him respect. During his lifetime, many people engaged in anti-slavery or other reform movements wanted his support, but they were rejected. Emerson certainly sympathized with these movements and wanted them all to do well. But he didn't think he should put his spirit and abilities on these sports, because that wasn't his specialty. He adhered to this principle very seriously, even if it was misunderstood.
Rockefeller once said to his son: "Living differently from others is one of the necessary conditions for success, and the people who dare to try are very rare." Most of the important decisions I made drew criticism from my friends. They all warned me out of good intentions that what I was doing was very dangerous, that there was a lack of hope of success, and that my rash procedures were so serious. When I quit my position in a big business to get into a small, unremarkable company after I qualified as a lawyer, I was ridiculed by my colleagues. Today our business is a direct result of the decisions made at that time. When I started learning to fly an airship at the age of 40, most people thought I was bored because the children were still very young. But according to this previous decision, our family has been enjoying pottery for many years. ”
It is not easy to adhere to an unsupported principle, or not to accommodate a generally supported principle. It does take a great deal of courage to be a person who does not go with the flow and is willing to hold fast to his convictions when under attack. Dale Carnegie once said the following thing.
"Once, I was at a social gathering and the conversation was moving on to something that had happened recently. At the time, everyone present agreed with a certain point of view, and only one man disagreed. He first politely did not express his opinion, and then because someone asked him his opinion bluntly, he smiled and said: 'I would have liked you not to ask me, because I am on a different side with you, and this is a pleasant social gathering.' But since you asked me, I'll give my opinion. Then he gave a brief explanation of his views, and was immediately besieged by everyone. Only to see him unswervingly stick to his position and make no concessions. As a result, although he did not convince others to agree with him, he won the respect of everyone. Because he held fast to his faith and did not be the answering worm of other people's thoughts. "Today, we live in an age full of experts. Since we have become so accustomed to relying on the authoritative views of these experts, we have gradually lost confidence in ourselves and have been unable to give opinions or to hold our convictions in many matters. The reason these experts have taken our place so easily is because we let them do it.
Our current educational trends are designed for an established personality model, so it is difficult to train any leadership talent in this kind of education. Since most people are followers, not leaders, although we need the training of leaders, we also need to train ordinary people how to consciously and wisely obey the leadership. In this way, they will not blindly follow like the cattle sent to the slaughterhouse.
Most people (male or female) don't realize that they're actually the greatest experts in the world—in their own world, their families, or their careers, they do something only because some "expert" says it, or because it's a fad, and they can make a scene by doing it.
Edgar Mohr often warns us with what he calls the "group situation," which he believes "kills the precious value of the human individual." Mohr once said, "Since human beings cannot reach the realm of angels, this is not a reason why they must become ants." ”
What we should do is: keep ourselves as we really are. Harlow Dass, former president of Princeton University, is concerned about the question of whether or not to conform to groups. In a speech entitled "The Importance of Being an Independent Individual" at the 1955 student graduation ceremony, he pointed out: "Only when people find themselves will they understand why they came into this world, what they are going to do, and where they are going to go later. ”