I am a stay-at-home mom, a stay-at-home mom who is constantly fulfilling her self-worth. Reject anxiety, refuse "inner volume", easy parenting, rational treatment of married life, tolerant response to the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, I hope that some of my views can make you suddenly enlightened, can bring you positive energy, and solve your practical problems.
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In 1999, a family in Nanjing ushered in a huge event that made the whole family dance, and the identical quadruplets were born smoothly.
These four girls are known as the "Four Little Phoenixes of Nanjing".
In 2001, a peasant family in Henan gave birth to heterozygotic quintuplets born of natural conception, which caused a sensation across the country.
By 2002, the parents of the quintuplets and other family members were still working hard to take care of their children, and Nanjing Si Xiaofeng had begun to learn piano.
A completely different upbringing
Si Xiaofeng began to learn piano at the age of 3 and dance at the age of 4, and the primary school was Chinese school xianlin branch in Nanjing.
Nanjing netizens are no strangers to Nanjing Foreign Chinese School, Nanjing Foreign Chinese Xianlin Branch, there are primary schools, middle schools and high schools, primary school tuition fees of 25600 yuan per semester, four children a year tuition fees of 204800 yuan, which is an ordinary family's full income for a year.
In addition, the child's interest cultivation, dressing, eating, playing, raising these four children, a year will cost hundreds of thousands.
At this time, in this family in Henan, in order to raise children, the four children had to be temporarily separated, because of the difficult living conditions, they received the attention of caring people from all walks of life and the help of people from all walks of life.
Some people donated milk powder, some people donated diapers, some people donated money and some people donated goods, and with the help of people from all walks of life, the five children grew up healthily.
After graduating from junior high school, Si Xiaofeng went to a private high school in California, USA, and by 2018, the four sisters were admitted to the Berkeley Conservatory of Music at the same time, and two of the four sisters received scholarships.
The four sisters studied contemporary music writing and arranging, and the idea of forming a band came up in the United States.
In 2020, the four sisters were signed by Nicholas Tse and officially debuted.
In the process of growing up with four children, he has been on the big stage many times and has cooperated with famous film and television stars such as Su Youpeng, which has been well received.
At a time when the four sisters are attracting much attention, there are also quintuplets in Henan.
When the quadruplets debuted, the quintuplets took the college entrance examination in the same year, and the parents of the quintuplets hoped that their children would receive a systematic education, not like them.
The fifth of the five children was admitted to the Hebei Chemical and Pharmaceutical Vocational and Technical College through "separate enrollment" before the college entrance examination, the eldest scored 498 points, the third took 442 points, the fourth took the 447 points, and the second was the weakest after birth, and the college entrance examination scored 269 points.
People think that when five children go to college, parents should be at ease, but the real pressure on parents of quintuplets has just begun.
The children have grown up, the rescue from all walks of life has decreased, the five children need money to study, the two children marry their daughters-in-law, and the preparation of the house requires money, which is too much pressure for the parents of the peasants.
The number of children is not a problem, the family background is the biggest problem
Two families, one family raised quadruplet girls, one family raised quintuplets, in terms of the cost of raising children, the annual cost of the Nanjing quadruplet family is on top of the cost of the quintuplet family for ten years, and the four children, like the children of other urban families, enjoy a good education, do not have to bear the pressure of learning, and go to the canoe bridge of the college entrance examination.
The parents of the quintuplet family are farmers, and it is not easy to support five children, just like many rural families, where can we still take into account the children's education problems and resource problems.
When the child comes, there is no way but to raise it hard, but this also shows a real problem: poor families really can't expect to have more children to change their living conditions, and if there is no help from people from all walks of life, it is difficult to imagine how this family will spend this difficult decade or so.
For wealthy families, parents can provide good educational resources for their children, although the amount of raising children is large, but each child can be like many other children, have good educational resources and network resources, and enjoy good living conditions.
Want to say something to the average family
What is an ordinary family?
Probably like the family conditions like you and me, we can basically achieve material freedom and provide children with good living conditions and educational resources.
But only that, if you raise one more child, you need to adjust the standard of living and the educational resources provided to the child.
For an ordinary family like ours, it is better to be realistic.
If we want to provide better resources for our children and hope to be able to broaden their horizons and patterns as much as possible, we cannot blindly ask our children to carry out overall planning from the actual income of the family.
If there are no requirements for the future of the child, of course, you can have two more children, and you can raise the child well.
If you can't provide your child with good educational resources, don't expect your child to become the dragon and phoenix among people.
On the one hand, some parents cannot provide good educational resources for their children, and their attitude in academics is "free range", but when the children grow up, they hate their children for not showing up.
In this way, it is only the feelings between parents and children that are hurt in the end, and the emotions of individuals are affected.
We are often prone to make a mistake, only to see the scenery of others, can not see the efforts of others, raising an excellent child is really not easy, the hard work and efforts of parents, as well as the principles and educational methods adhered to, is not seen by others.
Just as people don't succeed casually, children don't succeed casually.
Every child will not be excellent casually, and every child who is raised and abandoned has a reason, wanting children to become an excellent person, the child's talent must be, and the parents' efforts are even more indispensable.