1, yesterday went to the supermarket to buy cigarettes, bought a package of 20, gave the boss 50. Looking for me 40, I pretended not to know, put it in my pocket and left. Didn't go far the boss called out to me: Your cigarette is not taken, me

1, yesterday went to the supermarket to buy cigarettes, bought a package of 20, gave the boss 50. Looking for me 40, I pretended not to know, put it in my pocket and left. The boss didn't go far and called me: Your cigarette was not taken, and I shed tears of emotion.

Take out ten dollars to the boss: you found me ten more dollars. The boss also left tears of emotion: boy, bring the cigarette, I will change it for you. Smoking the cigarette that the boss had just changed for me, the pure taste couldn't help but move me again: Boss, take the 50 just now and I will give you another one.

The boss took the 50 and was also touched again: Young man, give me the money that was looking for you just now, and I will change it for you. After taking the boss to find my money again, I was also moved again, and took out a mobile phone from my pocket: Boss, the mobile phone is returned to you. The boss was in tears, trembling and pulling out a wallet: Boy, the wallet is back to you.

2, because I am afraid that the future child will inherit my single eyelid, I have not wanted a child. In the end, I was unexpectedly pregnant, and my husband encouraged me to give birth to this child. Now my daughter is 5 years old and yesterday I took her to the hospital for a vaccination. The daughter said innocently, "Mom, what are we going to do?" Me: "Of course it's an injection." Daughter: "Why do you want to get a needle, what did the needle do wrong?" Doesn't the needle hurt? After 5 minutes, my daughter began to cry: "This is a needle hitting me, this is a needle hitting me..."

3. After the cousin was dumped by the chairman of the company, she borrowed wine at home all day to pour sorrow. Yesterday she suddenly became unwell and called me to accompany her to the hospital for a check-up, and it turned out that she was pregnant. After that, we took the bus home, and there were so many people in the bus that we could only stand. At this time, the cousin walked up to a couple and said to the man: I am pregnant! The man looked at my cousin in amazement, and the girl's eyes widened. The air froze for three seconds, and then the girl "snapped" at the man and got out of the car.

The equatorial cousin with the long reflection arc said everything: Let me have a seat?

4． When I was in chemistry class today, the teacher asked a question, which was a multiple choice question. The table mate whispered: D. I was silent for a moment and said, "C." The teacher looked at us and then said, "Classmate Chen can stick to his wrong answer, it's good." After sitting down, the teacher gave us this question. After class, I asked at the same table: Why don't you believe me? I replied helplessly: I was full of crisp noodles, and as soon as I said D, it all squirted out.

5． I studied at MIT and had a single guy in my dorm. When he returned to his dormitory after class today, he kept talking dirty. I asked him curiously what was going on, and he said that in order to find a girlfriend, he wanted to choose an elective with more girls in class. Then he chose "women's studies", and today when he entered the classroom, all the masters, only the teachers were women!

6． The female manager's family is Dink, and after marriage, her husband couldn't stand it for half a year, and finally decided to divorce. Today she went on a blind date, and as soon as she entered the door, she saw a cup full of cigarette butts. The female manager asked, "How addicted are you?" Man: "About 18 packs a day." The manager laughed and said, "Like you who smoke Chinese seeds every day, can you drive a BMW after 10 years?" The man was stunned for a moment, and then took the Lamborghini key from his pocket and put it on the table. Looking at the manager defiantly, he said: "I don't like BMW very much, I prefer Lamborghini." ”

7． Playing a guessing activity in the father-in-law's house, the teleprompter reads "mobile phone". Mother-in-law: "It's a rectangular thing!" The old man thought. Mother-in-law: "You can hold it." The old man wiped his head. Mother-in-law: "It can be used for selfies." The old man suddenly realized: "I know, it is a brick!" "Mother-in-law:"

8． There are a lot of friends around who are playing LOLicon, and I also downloaded one to play. After entering the game, I decisively chose the Power of Demacia Galen. Why, you ask me? Because I think that a manly husband should be in good shape, and the second is to be resistant to fighting. The main thing is that the skills are cool, and I am intoxicated by seeing his big moves. I learned the W skill at the first level and then went to the wild, I bypassed the red Buff to go to the anti-wild. So I'm sure I lost in the end, and it had nothing to do with me, because in 3 minutes there were several avatars on the screen, and then they all stopped moving in the spring, and what brains were said before the avatars were displayed! Brutal wild, what the hell am I doing wrong?

9． In order to get his son admitted to a good university, the rich man spent a lot of money to send his son to Huanggang High School. Since then, my son has been in high school outside the home and can only come back once every six months. On this day, the son called the rich man and said that the school would charge a make-up tuition fee, three hundred yuan, and wanted to have more points, so he said that he would charge three hundred and fifty yuan. As a result, I did not expect the rich man to say to his wife: Wife, son collects supplementary tuition fees, three thousand!

10． The newly hired female colleague is ready to give gifts to the manager of the company, hoping that the manager will promote herself. Female colleagues carefully come up with two sets of plans: if the lead is not very enthusiastic, send souvenirs; if the lead is very enthusiastic, send shopping cards. The next day, the female colleague came to the manager's house, and the manager poured tea and welcomed himself very warmly. The female colleague decided to send the card, while drinking tea, nervous and sweaty, and took out the card and put it on the coffee table when she went out. The female colleague fled back to the hotel! How to the hotel can not open the door, it turned out that just sent is the hotel room card! That night, the female colleague did not sleep well, and the manager did not sleep well... The female colleague said: Awkward!

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