Wu Yu: I want this kind of happiness, sleep well when you should sleep, eat well when you should eat, and party well when you should party. There is a cool breeze on the summer night and a sunny day in the winter morning, so it is very good.
One
Particularly fond of a definition of happiness: someone loves, something to do, something to look forward to.
People have the desire to be loved in their nature, so that some extreme people will gain the love and attention of the opposite sex through one cry, two troubles, three hangings, etc., they would rather hurt themselves to get the love of others, which shows how important it is to be loved.
Doing something makes us truly have the meaning and value of existence in this society. Although the world seems unfair, the fairest thing is that we all have to face death, and at the moment of death you have to face how much value you have created for the world, and this is often not related to the starting point, but to what you do.
If the world is constantly improving, it is probably because people have hope. In ancient China, the ancients proposed to build a Cosmopolitan society. Today's China strives to build a socialist country, and these beliefs support us to forge ahead every day. In contrast, man's greatest sorrow is that there is no hopeless life. From that empty look, we don't see a trace of life.
Many people are satisfied with these three points, but why do people still generally feel unhappy? In particular, many newlyweds have a greatly reduced sense of happiness. According to incomplete statistics, the divorce rate in super-first-tier cities such as Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou, and Shenzhen is as high as 50 percent! What a terrible number!
In addition to the amazement, we can't help but ask:
Who moved my happiness?
Two
People have three dimensions to support themselves: self, family, and career
If one of these three dimensions is not developed evenly, it will make people lack happiness, and the disaster that may follow may be triggered.
The first is the ego. It is human nature that all people are selfish and inevitable.
But when you enter marriage, you have to face the state change from one person to two people, and one family to two families.
The generation that has just reached marriageable age is mostly only children. People who grew up in an only family harvest all the love from their ancestors for two generations. They have felt since childhood that they are the center of the universe, and that everyone should revolve around them.
I was also an only child, and I discovered my selfish nature at a very young age. One of the most memorable occasions was when a buddy came to play with me, and I ate more than half of the snacks I brought to him before I went downstairs, and my mother saw me gobbling up and said with great contempt: How can you be so selfish!
I can remember this sentence for a lifetime, and since then I have tried to get out of selfishness and learn to share and no longer think only for myself.
Similarly, if one party enters the married life of two people with an infinitely magnified self, the result can be imagined. This will bring you an ending that you are not happy with me, and happiness will naturally leave them.
So when you abandon yourself and love each other the way you love yourself, you will reap the joy of happiness again.
This is followed by the family, which is the smallest constituent unit of society. If every family is happy, the country will be happy too. But the truth is that many friends, especially women, are ruining their marriages precisely because they attach great importance to the construction of the family.
This type of woman has an exclusive name: housewife. Many of them are the elite of this society and have their own careers. Finally, because of a man's sentence I raise you, and then look at the difference between his salary and the man's, I really fantasize about living a happy life with my husband and godson.
But the moment many women give up their careers, it means the beginning of a disaster. They work hard to take care of their home, and the biggest expectation every day is to wait for their husbands to come home for dinner.
But you know, men are social, and they always have a few days a week when they don't eat at home. At this time, you find that the center of gravity of dependence is gone, and a person is holding on to the empty house to endure sorrow.
If a person has nothing to do, he will always amplify a lot of sesame big things, which is why many old people often like li jia short, because this is a big thing in their eyes.
If your husband, who has been tired for a day, listens to you chewing his wife's tongue in his ear as soon as he comes home, which man loves to listen?
When men are repulsive to going home, they enter a vicious circle. Women will be suspicious when confronted with a man who does not always come home. Once suspicion arises in a marriage, it is difficult to maintain the happiness of this marriage at a high level.
In the end, the marriage broke down, and this is all because the family occupies too much of your heart, and it is natural that happiness is diluted.
Women can be housewives, but they must have their own circle of friends and have a thing they can do. Now with the network, a lot of work can be done. When a man sees that his woman's life at home is also full of wind and color, he will be more family-loving.
Finally, there is the cause. We need to know what is behind the cause we are struggling to pursue?
Many people are pursuing success in wealth, but wealth is endless. Human desire is like a bottomless hourglass, and you will not be full of it.
If the pursuit of wealth and success will be happy, there will be no incident of the former Kodak boss jumping off a building to commit suicide, when his company has covered ninety percent of the global film market, it is really a huge billionaire. But when people find that wealth does not satisfy their pursuit of happiness, the emptiness of the heart is likely to be solved by death.
This society always has a price that is clearly marked, but the price is not equal to the value. Maybe a love letter is precious to you, but worthless to others.
We should follow the most authentic demands of our hearts and not be led by the nose of this utilitarian society. You should pursue things that make you valuable, not toil for those numbers for a lifetime.
This is also why many super-rich people end up donating because they feel that their money can help others, and this feeling of being needed is not something that money can buy.
So, you don't have to deliberately pursue how much success you have in your career, when the money you make in your career can provide sufficient security for your life, you have to stop and wait for the other two dimensions.
Three
Maintaining a balance of three dimensions, happiness will get a high score.
When a person's love and marriage are together, when a person's hobbies and careers are together, when faith and life are together, then he is happy.
Treating self, marriage, and career equally, so that they are neither extremely scarce nor excessively full, keeping the three going hand in hand and learning gratitude and contentment, this is the way to happiness.
Those who are happy are masters of weakening self-awareness and behavior habits, strengthening self-worth in marriage, and receiving good things in their careers.
In fact, no one has ever touched our happiness from beginning to end, and it is our own hands that drive away happiness.
◆ If you want to read more emotional stories, listen to the original author Wu Yu's audio program "Night Wu Yu"
You can search for and add WeChat public account "Wuyu TalkShow" or "Wuyutalkshow"
This article is the original author of the headline number. Unauthorized reproduction is not permitted.
Welcome to leave a message in the comment area to forward Oh O (∩_∩) O haha~