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In the TV series "Thirty Only", Zhong Xiaoqin said a very heartfelt sentence: "In the chain of recruitment and contempt, the bottom is that the thirty-year-old is married and childless, and may become pregnant and have children at any time."
30 years old may be the best age for men to expand their careers, but for women, it is a watershed.
Before the age of 30, women may still be naïve and wanton, or they can avoid the unpleasantness in life. After the age of 30, women must be more mature and work harder to face the imperfections of life.
After the age of 30, women want a better life and must learn these three things.
Learn to love yourself
A neighbor next to me, the husband is idle, spending a lot of money, the family has two sons to raise, life is very difficult.
In order to make more money, she works overtime almost every day, 30 days a month, and overtime may include 50 days of overtime, and the other 20 days of overtime are for her colleagues. When she doesn't go to work, she will go to the stall to sell vegetables and not miss any opportunity to make money.
Years of hard work have dragged down her body, and in her 40s, she is already wrinkled and sick, often living on painkillers.
And her efforts have not been exchanged for her husband's heartache and gratitude. For more than ten years, her husband has never repented, and she has always been the one who carries everything.
A woman who is married always gives everything for the family. They strive to be a good wife and a good mother, they love their husbands and children, but they always forget to love themselves.
Women want their husbands to love themselves, but they always wait to be disappointed. The husband's love is either missing or not the way you want it to be.
In fact, the way others treat you is what you teach others.
You don't value yourself, and others won't value you. You don't respect yourself, and others won't give you respect.
Montaigne said, "Only those who love themselves can be loved." Self-love is the premise of his love, you love yourself enough, others will love you enough.
The marriage of diving queen Guo Jingjing and Huo Qigang is often praised.
When it comes to this happy marriage, people always feel that Guo Jingjing is married well. But as everyone knows, all this is Guo Jingjing's own deserved.
When the reporter asked Guo Jingjing what he thought of marrying into the giants, Guo Jingjing said: There are many giants, but there is only one Olympic champion. Guo Jingjing's self-esteem and self-love made her respected by her husband's family and also harvested a happy marriage.
Oscar Wilde said: "Self-love is the beginning of a long romantic history of life. ”
Women after 30, don't always wait for someone else to love you. Love does not have to be given by others, love can also be given by oneself.
Be nice to yourself every day, take good care of your body, pay attention to your emotions, meet your needs, and make yourself happier and more energetic.
Even if no one in this world loves you, you have to love yourself. Believe in yourself and you can give yourself strength.
Learn to manage yourself
There is a story in "Be a Woman with a Strong Heart": on a train, a lady kept complaining, one would say that the window was leaking, the other would feel that the food was too unpalatable, in short, everything on the car made her dissatisfied. Although she was richly dressed, her behavior was disgusting.
Her husband appeared helpless and jokingly called her a "depressed manufacturer."
Like this lady, many women are completely out of control of their emotions, constantly complaining and throwing tantrums, and they act like an emotional trash can that makes everyone else want to stay away.
In fact, nine times out of ten things life is not satisfactory, whose life is not a chicken feather?
Whose life is full of happiness?
If you want to vent your emotions because of a small thing, then life will be filled with negative emotions, and even suffer the consequences of it.
Li Baoli, the heroine of the movie "Ten Thousand Arrows Through the Heart", is such a person.
She has a flamboyant personality, and when she encounters unpleasant things, she will complain and complain, and even speak ill of each other.
Her fiery temper keeps her husband away from her, her mother-in-law accuses her, and her biological son hates her. As a result, she gave the most to her family, but was the least recognized and understood by her family.
In fact, in this family, Li Baoli is not the only one who is at fault, but if Li Baoli can manage her emotions, it may be a different ending.
Emotions are like a double-edged sword, and if you don't manage it well, it will hurt you.
In carnegie's advice to women on the happiness of life, it is said: "Your opponent is your own emotions, and only when you overcome and become the masters of emotions can you gain a truly free body and make you happy." ”
After the age of 30, women face the dual pressures of career and family, and are more likely to produce negative emotions. Only by learning to manage emotions will we not be trapped by emotions.
When you're stuck in negative emotions, take a deep breath to give yourself a cushion. Sometimes, there is only one step between the trap of emotion and reason. When you press the pause button in time, the emotion is in your hands.
The really powerful person is the one who can control emotions.
Learn to be on your own
Judy Reisnick, chairman of a securities management firm and investment bank, experienced multiple blows of divorce and cancer in the first half of her life, starting over at the age of 40, starting as a securities company clerk and working hard to the position of chairman in the securities industry, which is all male.
Judy Resnick is a beautiful woman who did not choose to rely on men, but created a brilliant life on her own. Such a life has also won her more dignity and freedom.
The book "Be a Woman with a Strong Heart" says: A woman with a good career is financially independent and more confident in front of her family and friends.
How many women, for the sake of the family, give up their work, give everything they want, but look at the face of their husbands to live?
With the ability to support herself, women have the confidence not to be attached to others.
A woman's life should not be filled by a family.
Women can also have careers and pursuits.
With the ability to support themselves, women can better pursue their dreams and live the life they want.
Zhang Ailing, a talented woman in the literary world, is a self-reliant and independent woman.
Zhang Ailing's early experience can be summarized by her father's painlessness and mother's lack of love, and she has been disliked since she was a child.
So, after she was able to support herself by writing articles, she never asked her family for a penny. She once said: "Even if it is the property of the parents, the husband's money, it is not as good as using the money earned by themselves to be free, that is a woman's right." ”
After the age of 30, women want to be their backers, not only because you already have this ability, but also because this is what you have to do.
The shelf life of a marriage is not a lifetime, when the accident comes, who can you rely on to survive the crisis?
It is better to give your life to others than to yourself.
Spend more time to improve your work ability, enrich your mind, and broaden your horizons. When you become strong, good will follow.
The most decent way to live as a woman is to rely on yourself.
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Some people say: Life is an experience.
From waiting to be fed to self-reliance, from ignorance to vicissitudes, people continue to grow in experience, step by step towards maturity.
In this experience, everyone is trying to grow.
And the speed and height of your growth determine the happiness of your life. Life belongs to the strong, and the real strong are all strong people with strong hearts.
Carnegie said: "A woman can be weak on the outside, but strong on the inside." Because the power carried by women is not only about themselves, but also affects the whole family. ”
If you are also 30+, you also feel that women should be strong inside, then I recommend reading this book: "Be a strong woman with a strong heart". Learn to love yourself, manage yourself, rely on yourself, be a strong woman at heart, and live a wonderful life.