From opening up to melodious pandering

I have a friend, from college to now, a friendship of nearly 11 years.

In college, we were all the envy of others, eating together, running together, shopping together, because a major, a class, and a dormitory, so we were inseparable. I remember her being sloppy and always a mess on the bed; she loved to sleep lazily, skipping class many times and sleeping in the dormitory (of course I was timid and didn't escape with her); she had rhinitis, and every winter her nose was just like everyone else's, and it was uncomfortable to rub until it was red and swollen. She has kiwi allergies, loves the military, loves gossip (of course we gossip together). Although she has many bad habits, she is very righteous and cheerful, and is a straight-talking sunshine girl.

After working, I found a stable job, the salary is not high, but also to work shifts, she changed several jobs back and forth, are not very suitable, fortunately, I finally found a job with a very good income, we naturally rented a house together. In my spare time, I was also together, and then I got married and had children, and she quickly fell in love and got married. Because I moved away after I got married, she fell in love for almost two years after I got married, I was busy at work at that time, stressful, she estimated that she was thinking about this, so she was in love, I should be the last to know. I'm actually hurt inside for this. But listening to her say that the other party is very good to her, family conditions are also OK, I also sincerely wish her, after all, she once insisted on marrying a soldier, but she could not meet.

The ordinary days pass day by day, we all have our own families, in 2020 my daughter was born, and at the beginning of 2021, I found myself unexpectedly pregnant, and after several consultations with the family, I finally decided to stay, and my son was born in October 2021. After all, for a traditional family, I am now considered to be complete, with children and daughters. All that is experienced in the middle should be understood by only those who have experienced it. She also wanted to start trying to get pregnant, but she went through vaccinations in the middle, so she postponed it.

Her life after marriage is the same, and her husband treats her like he did before marriage. It's just that the family is too trivial, the husband's emotional intelligence is low, the mother-in-law is often sick and hospitalized, slowly, she is not as cheerful as the original, she has experienced the polishing of life, she is restless, she began to complain about the low emotional intelligence of her husband, complained that the mother-in-law did not listen to advice, and did not taboo. Then I advised her that I hoped she would have a good life and that she would be cheerful and optimistic. I hadn't experienced it, so I really couldn't understand her, which led me now to be afraid to persuade her or say that she was bad and that her family was good. I may also have a low emotional intelligence, so low that I don't know how to comfort her, I don't know how to make her look forward, I don't know how to make her deal with all this. Is it that the chicken feathers in this place have continued like this, so that the sunshine girl will not be able to come back?

We used to open our hearts and talk about the world, and now I have to think about even a word of comfort and organize the words. What has life been through? How bad are the years? To make people endure this, we must continue to move forward. Although I have not reached the song to meet, but how much is it?!