Love is divided into two types, either love at first sight or long-term love.
The former meets unexpectedly and looks at the feelings; the latter is unconsciously established, looking at the state of being together.
But the feeling of love at first sight often comes from the outside, and the love generated in this way will be less stable.
And long-term love is a kind of affection between two people of the opposite sex who have known each other, have common experiences, and constantly understand each other.
Only now, many people do not believe in "long-term love", because they can't see it at first glance, how can they be willing to get along later?
In fact, the long-term love is more that the person is not noticed at first glance, and after slow contact, may fall in love with each other.
This kind of "long-term love" love is sometimes more reliable than love at first sight.
It is based on the fact that you may not notice each other at first glance, so that you waste too much time on the way to meeting love.
When I look back, I find that my love has always been around.
01
It is often these five relationships that are in love with each other
1. Green plum bamboo horse
Growing up together, the young plum bamboo horse will have a special emotion and trust relative to other relationships.
This emotion is rooted in the memories of youth.
Even after adulthood, most people still have a deep attachment to their feelings when they were young.
At that time, the feelings were the most sincere, that is, the so-called "green plum bamboo horse, two small no guesses".
A highly acclaimed Douban high-scoring drama called "Little Annie", which tells such feelings.
In the late 19th century, Anne, a little girl adopted from an orphanage by a pair of farm brothers and sisters, had a passion, sincerity and wisdom that was different from those around her.
After an encounter with Gilbert, an equally intelligent and kind boy, a sadistic "long-term love affair" begins.
In the beginning, Gilbert always liked to use the little boy's pranks to attract Annie's attention, but Anne always chose to avoid and ignore.
But after the two helped each other, they both made their intentions clear, and finally confessed to each other and kissed each other.
Although they went to different universities and things and circumstances around them changed, they still maintained correspondence.
Many good memories are formed when they are young, and even if there is less contact afterwards, there will still be a sense of common cognition and familiarity in the subconscious.
When you are young, your playmates may suddenly realize after going around: it turns out that the other party is true love.
The great advantage of Qingmei Bamboo Horse is that understanding each other will be deeper than others, and they will feel very comfortable and comfortable with each other.
At this time, the deeper the understanding, the easier it is to put the other party in a special position, and it is easier to have feelings.
2. Friends who are in regular contact
When the opposite sex comes into contact, it is through contact to promote or even deepen feelings.
Two people who are in constant contact are the easiest to develop into lovers.
In the movie "When Harry Meets Sally", the male and female protagonists Harry and Sally met each other on the way to New York.
Although the two talked to each other on the way and broke up unhappily, five years later, the two met unexpectedly at the airport and hurriedly parted.
Ten years later, Sally, who was in love, once again met Harry, who had just divorced, and they became good friends.
Even Harry said to Sally, "We're going to be friends... You're probably the first attractive woman I don't want to bring to bed. ”
So the two of them began to contact.
This kind of connection can cross the barriers of time and space, such as making phone porridge before going to bed, spending Christmas together, and making suggestions for each other's feelings.
Harry and Sally have an indescribable tacit understanding, just like the usual confidants, they love each other in the name of friends, and they are brothers and girlfriends to each other.
They know each other better than each other's lovers and seem to be the indispensable person in each other's lives.
But they are better than good friends, but because both of them are afraid of losing, they accompany each other as girlfriends or brothers.
But after that, the relationship deteriorated, and Sally felt that she could no longer be with Harry like a friend, and she made a request to end the 12-year friendship and chose to leave.
Finally, Harry finds Sally on New Year's Eve to confess that they will remain with each other forever in their lives.
In fact, many times if you have a friend who you like silently, you may feel it if you look closely, and the other party is the same.
Two people who are not lovers but often contact often become confidants first, and then feel that the other party knows themselves very well.
Because you can understand it in order to talk, so slow contact and mutual companionship will greatly increase the intimacy.
The last day is just a chance, so be brave and maybe you can harvest love.
3. Look at each other unfavorably or even oppose
It is often found that love is often produced in the midst of fighting.
The two did not like each other at first, but then became each other's partners, although they had been afraid of each other and did not want to see each other, but they did not know that they attracted each other's attention.
Like Sally and Harry, their first meeting was due to disagreement and a disagreement.
Later, Harry knew about Sally's troubles and "black history", and Sally knew better than anyone about all of Harry's bad habits.
In front of each other, they don't need to make a good impression, they don't need to deliberately hide their true side.
It is precisely because they do not look at each other well, and in the subsequent relationship, when they find that the other party is different and there is a contrast, they will care more.
Of course, this must be premised on the premise that in the eyes of the other party, you have other places worth appreciating.
As Harry expressed in his final confession, I know you're imperfect and full of little flaws of one kind or another, but it's the one I'm in love with.
Even before, the relationship seemed to be so incompatible, time may change the feelings between the two people.
There is no "absolute" state of relationship between man and man.
What we have to do is to follow our own hearts and not be limited by the unpleasantness of the past.
4. Old classmates, old classmates
It is said that when you go to school, it is the time when a person's thinking is the most simple and sincere, and he has not yet been immersed in society, and his feelings have no impurities.
The secret affection between classmates is also the feeling that many people yearn for, and is considered to be the purest love in the world.
Zhang Yingying, the name that has touched all the Chinese, and the heart-wrenching disappearance of American students.
To this day, the 4th anniversary is approaching, and Zhang Yingying's body has not been found.
Her boyfriend, Hou Xiaolin, was a classmate of Peking University.
In the three years of looking for his girlfriend, Hou Xiaolin was always in front of his girlfriend's parents, blocking the questions and inquiries of the outside world for them.
Previously, Hou Xiaolin thought that he was an inaccessible person, but in his relationship with Zhang Yingying, he was moved by this cheerful and smiling girl.
Hou Xiaolin never gave up looking for her, still believing that her soul existed.
I miss Zhang Yingying for eight years, from 2017 to the present, from her birth to death.
In those youthful days, there was such a person who brought good memories.
Whether or not you are still with each other, but there were real heartbeats and sweet moments at that time, it is worth remembering.
The friendship of two people's classmates, after contact walking together, nostalgic for the previous window time, it is also easy to "have a long-term love".
5. Colleagues who are often in contact with at work
From school to the workplace, a lot of "long-term love" starts from work.
But many people are more resistant to this "office romance" because most people will want to find someone who does not coincide with their work radius.
This can make your life a little different, but the reality is that as a two-point and one-line office worker, it is difficult to contact the opposite sex outside of work.
Even if you can contact it, it takes time to understand, and in contrast, colleagues are more knowledgeable, especially colleagues who are often in contact with at work.
In the process of getting along, two people will deepen their understanding of both sides, and they are more likely to appreciate each other in the process of doing things together.
Yulin, a friend of many years, met and fell in love with her husband He Wei because of a cross-departmental activity of the former company.
Yulin and her husband both work in the same company, she is in the product development department, and her husband is in the sales department.
Once, in order to improve product functions to meet market demand, Yulin's department invited colleagues from the sales department to do research and hold a meeting together.
As an assistant to the product manager, Yulin was asked by the leader to sort out the detailed analysis data on the day after the meeting and complete the improvement plan within three days.
But when the meeting was over, it was already evening, and the other colleagues were off work, but Yulin couldn't eat, so he sorted out the data at the workstation alone.
When she inadvertently looked up, she saw that the entire company's open room was pitch black, except for He Wei's workstation on the sales department.
When she was finished and packed up, she looked up and found He Wei still sitting quietly at the workstation with the light on.
She asked, "Do you also work overtime?" But He Wei only replied vaguely, and then said, "Let's go together." ”
So she didn't say anything anymore, but she thought it was strange for salespeople to work overtime, and she didn't care at that time.
After three consecutive days, Yulin worked late at the company, although she was more afraid of the dark, but there was no way to catch up with the progress.
But every time when she got up to get ready for work, she could see He Wei sitting at her workstation waiting, and once took the initiative to send her home.
Later, every time He Wei saw her working overtime, he silently waited for her to go back together, and said: "I'm afraid it's too late, it's not safe for you to go back as a girl." ”
This made Yulin very moved, and as the days went on, they also had a tacit understanding, and they would meet together to get off work and eat.
Then, the two naturally came together, and later married.
This kind of long-term affection is also because of the actual contact, nine to five in the company to look down and not look up, the distance is very close.
Two people have more time to spend together, facing the opposite sex that occupies most of their time, so it is easy to become a long-term relationship together.
Although there is a saying called "day long to see people's hearts", day long love is not absolute, and it is not necessarily true love.
All love happens with an element of liking.
Or there is a certain trait that can produce attraction, more or less good feelings. True love must have a certain degree of self-discipline and moral bottom line.
When the party with a good feeling finds that the other party already has a partner or even a family, it is necessary to pay attention to proportions and not to get too close.
Otherwise, it is easy to hold on, and such a long-term relationship should be cut off in time.
Men and women who can really have a long-term relationship grasp these things, and it will develop into love after a long time.
Otherwise, even if you get closer and stay for a long time, it is useless.
Author | Mu Chu Media copywriting planning, has specialized in applied psychology, focus on writing, keen on the study of psychoanalytic and emotional psychology, proverbs: everything learned, become a character, listen carefully and record every soul story around you.