01
There is a popular saying in this world that a man loves one person and eventually marries another person.
What does that mean? Let's briefly translate it first, that is, he loves a woman very much, but he does not marry her, and the final choice of marriage is another woman.
Such a phenomenon abounds in real life, and we often see a man who has been with a woman for many years and ends up marrying a woman he doesn't love so much, or that he is married but has a very, very loving woman outside of marriage, and he will not divorce for this woman.
Many women have been hurt by this, whether it is the woman he loves very much but does not marry, or the woman who marries home, it has already caused harm. For a woman who loves very much but does not marry, if this woman does not love him, then there is no harm to speak of, if the woman also loves him, but sees him marry someone else, how painful it should be in her heart.
And for the woman who didn't love so much but married home, she lived with him and didn't get his love, which is not a kind of harm.
Even if you scold such men and call them scum, it still can't change them to continue to do so. Some people may say that who a man marries to go home is who he loves the most, there is no one who loves a person but does not marry home, no, there are really such men in this world, they just won't marry the woman they love the most.
Who to marry seems to them to be nothing more than a life choice, similar to which job to choose, or where to live, as a result of their weighing the pros and cons.
02
Why do men do this? Many women are confused about this and can't understand why this is the case.
To find the answer, we must start with the purpose of the man's marriage. For a man, the main purpose of his marriage is to form a new family, and there is a person who can be his own helper, take care of the family, take care of the children, and even help him take care of his parents, it is best to be able to help in his career, which is the main principle of most men to marry.
So when they are looking for a marriage partner, they must start from reality, and they will consider what this person can bring to themselves? Is it possible to take care of the family? Cleaning, laundry and cooking, or all help in the career?
At the same time, it may also consider the economic strength of the other party, whether it will make money, and how to work, and make a comprehensive assessment through these dimensions. If after evaluation, you find that the person you love very much does not help yourself much, and you will have the idea of giving up.
Because most men are in love with each other, they are attracted by each other's first impression, which mainly refers to appearance, the vanity brought by enjoying her beauty, and feeling that it is very face-saving to take it out.
But as long as he considers getting married and finds that the other party is beautiful and cannot bring any benefits to himself, he will feel that this person is not suitable for being a wife.
As long as you pay attention to observation, you can find that many men evaluate a woman, and they like to use "whether it is suitable for marriage" to evaluate each other, suitable for marriage, referring to the person's gentleness, virtuousness, can take care of the family, or has strong ability and can help themselves. Not fit for marriage means not being able to take care of the family and not being able to help yourself.
03
There is a movie abroad called "The End of the Race", which can well explain that a man loves a woman very much, but marries a woman who does not love so much.
The male protagonist Wilton is a poor boy, in order to change his life destiny to go to London to become a tennis coach, his destination is to enter high society through this way, he is lucky, really fell in love with the rich woman Chloe.
Chloe loves him very much, but he doesn't love Chloe so much, but instead falls in love with Nora, who has a tragic life with him, Nora is Chloe's brother's girlfriend, and the two of them secretly get together without everyone.
Nora is not liked by her boyfriend's mother and has been harassed, and Nora hopes that Wilton will go with her, but in the end he does not choose to leave for her, but marries Chloe. After the marriage, he met Nora again, and mixed with Nora again, and he was once again fascinated.
He loves Nora very much, always wants to be with him, to be with Nora, to slack off at work, to cheat on his wife, but even so, he has not given up the life he has for her. In the end, Nora becomes pregnant and forces him to divorce and marry her, and he is afraid of losing his existing life, so he conspires to kill her.
This is the reality of this type of man, who loves someone very much but will not marry her home, and they do not love a person, but marry her because of her superior conditions.
In their eyes, love is not the only criterion for marriage, not that it is necessary to love a person to marry her, in the face of material conditions, love can be abandoned.
04
Writing this article, mainly for girls' friends, because there are many girls who have encountered or are encountering and, in the future, may encounter such things, I hope they can see clearly why men are married, why they love someone very much but do not marry her.
If you are really unfortunate to meet such a man, it is not that you are not good, but he is too selfish and realistic, there is no need to be depressed, and there is no need to fall into a new life. Not worth it.
I hope that girls know what the purpose of men's marriage is, know what they are thinking when they choose to marry, and only by seeing the truth of this matter clearly will they not be upset.
If you are unfortunate enough to meet such a man, thank him for his grace of not marrying, because he married his wife with a purpose, they married his wife in order to bring benefits to himself, once you marry each other, it is difficult to imagine what will happen after marriage.
Understand the purpose of men's marriage, and at the same time, girls should also think carefully about whether to take love as the only standard of marriage, whether they should consider other conditions other than love, such as the character of the other party, whether they can share their own hardships, whether they can make progress together, and so on.
end
Article illustration | Stills from "The End of the Race"