If you're already middle-aged, do you remember what your mother looked like when she was younger? Don't flip through the photos and think carefully about what your mother's face looked like when she was younger. I guess you probably can't remember!
Are you shocked by this result?
For the past two days, I have been trying to piece together in my mind what my mother looked like when she was young, but unfortunately, I was not impressed at all. I remember my mother liked to embroider and sing, but I can't remember her face. The result made me unbelievable, how could I forget what my mother looked like when she was young? I am sad!
The reason for this shocking discovery is that when watching the Korean movie "Strange Her", I think there is a huge loophole in the film: the elderly heroine Oh Moe-soon accidentally went to a photo studio, and then magically returned to her childhood, back to 20 years old, and her middle-aged son did not recognize her until someone told him the truth, he was still unbelievable.
How can anyone not remember what their mother looked like when she was young? But after I experimented with myself, I believed that this was not a loophole in the film, but a real and cruel pain.
In the eyes of the child, the mother is a role that cares for and takes care of us, and she is a flat and continuously giving identity. We remember what she did, but we forget that she was also a three-dimensional, real, beautiful or ordinary woman, she originally had her own dreams and life, but unfortunately she was firmly locked in the wings of free flight by her family.
Director Huang Dong hyuk uses the form of comedy to express this theme, the details are full of warmth and emotion, but not as heavy as other family love films, but let the audience see their mother and see themselves in laughter and tears.
I have to admire the strength of Hwang Dong-hyuk, who once directed the film "The Melting Pot" that shook the whole of South Korea, and this magical comedy "Strange Her" also achieved good results at the box office and word-of-mouth, and was remade by China, Japan, Thailand and Vietnam, which is a good movie not to be missed.
<h1 class = "pgc-h-arrow-right" >1. If the mother becomes annoying, try to understand and empathize with her from her past experiences</h1>
The heroine of the film, Wu Moshun, once said when she was young that she did not want to become an old and ugly old woman, and committed suicide when she lived to be 30 years old. However, at the age of 30, she did not commit suicide, and after the widowhood, she had to pull her young son alone, and then became the most hated look of her year.
The elderly Wu Moshun is not only old and ugly, but most importantly, she is also unreasonable, strong and domineering, and has no mouth, bullying old women like her outside, pointing fingers at her daughter-in-law at home, angry that her daughter-in-law had a heart attack and almost died.
Such a mother is indeed unbearable. But all of her ways of doing things were not formed overnight, but the long and hard life had sharpened her into the hardest form. She lost her husband when she was young, raised her son alone, and had to pick up rotten vegetable leaves to eat at the most difficult times of her life. In order to make ends meet, she even robbed her benefactor's business. For the sake of her son, she did not remarry in her life.
So, all along, her son was all she had. However, the family has long since changed from a small family with only mother and son to a three-generation family, and she still surrounds her son with a concerned gaze, and even her daughter-in-law is difficult to get close.
Her strong, domineering, and poisonous tongue are the skills she has experienced in the long years to survive. But in the new era and more complex family relationships, that she was hard to accept, and she herself didn't realize it. Even if she realized, the character that had been shaped by the long years could not be changed overnight.
This is the limitation of man. We must acknowledge that there is something for everyone to put intolerable. Like understanding the imperfect self, trying to understand and understand the incomprehensible old man is also the most rational filial piety!
<h1 class = "pgc-h-arrow-right" >2. Every mother has her own story, and listening and accompanying her can make her spit out the anger and pride in her heart</h1>
Wu Moshun, who was in a coffee shop where he worked, showed off his son, and she said that in the old Pan family, the biggest person besides Secretary General Ban Ki-moon was her son Pan Xuanzhe.
Her son is a professor at a public university, and she flaunts her son in such a big tone, which inevitably makes outsiders feel ridiculous. And she didn't achieve the purpose of showing off: to be envied and affirmed.
I believe that this is a habit that many elderly people have, and they like to show their children in front of outsiders. They are passionate about this, half because of the loneliness and nature of the elderly, and half because they have no way to tell their children, and they can only talk about their children in this way.
Although Wu Moshun praised his son as a flower in front of outsiders, he was not accustomed to communicating with his son at home. She was beaten up in the coffee shop, suffered so much grievance, and came home without mentioning a word. Perhaps, when she was young, she was often subjected to this kind of grievance in order to live, and she was used to it.
Freud believed that unexpressed emotions never go away. They are simply buried alive and will one day erupt in a more "ugly" way.
And the way Wu Moshun broke out was arbitrary, strong and domineering, and harsh.
Her son was no longer a child who needed his mother to shelter himself from the wind and rain, and it was time for him to shelter his mother from the wind and rain. However, this son did not seem to be doing well.
If he could often accompany his mother, listen to her talk about the past, listen to her affirmation of herself, listen to the grievances she endured in her heart. Perhaps, the mother will not vent her inner emotions in a nasty way.
I don't think anyone wants to be harsh, annoying. Like Wu Moshun, she just didn't learn the right way to relieve emotions, nor did she find an ideal listening object. As children, they should help them.
<h1 class = "pgc-h-arrow-right" >3. Break the shackles of the family and give her back the freedom and choice of life</h1>
After Wu Moshun sent her daughter-in-law to the hospital, her granddaughter proposed that she be sent to a nursing home so that her daughter-in-law could recuperate with peace of mind. Wu Moshun overheard the conversation between his granddaughter and his son, and in order not to embarrass his son, he quietly ran away from home alone.
When she was desolate and helpless, she suddenly saw a "youth photo studio" across the street, and she went inside to take a good photo, which could be used as a relic. Unexpectedly, after the photographer pressed the shutter, she magically changed into what she looked like when she was 20 years old.
She once looked at a pair of shoes on the stall, she ran several times, read it many times, but she was reluctant to buy it. When she got younger, she not only bought those shoes, but also a lot of beautiful clothes. It was just the old woman's shoes and clothes that she liked, worn on the 20-year-old her, and it felt strange.
This sense of violation is a stinging pain for the audience. Mother always puts her own needs last, for the sake of family saving money, even if she loves beauty, she will secretly give up beautiful clothes and shoes.
Wu Moshun, who became younger, began to bloom his youth wantonly, because he sang well, was photographed by a director, and became a female singer sought after by everyone. Emotionally, she and the director who found her are both in love. This is the most beautiful youth.
However, her grandson was in a car accident and needed a blood transfusion, and only she and her grandson's blood type matched the family. But she found that if she bled, her skin would age immediately.
By this time, his son already knew her identity and said something to her, which was like a heavy tear bomb, making the audience's tear glands irresistible:
"My son, I'm here to save him. Let's go, you go! Don't eat what others have thrown away; don't eat seafood that smells fishy; don't live like a slave for the sake of children; don't look for a short-lived husband; don't give birth to an unfilial son like me. Please, go fast, Mom! ”
However, Wu Moshun still willingly chose to save his grandson, even if he turned back to the old and ugly Wu Moshun.
When she woke up from her hospital bed, everything was like a dream, and the only thing that could prove that it wasn't a dream was the hairpin on her head, given to her by the director who loved her. And when she gets older, she can only gaze at the young director from a distance on the street corner, and then turn around.
The shiny hairpin pinned to the pale hair was so glaring, so prickly. Wu Moshun still gave up a free life and chose to pay for his family.
But in reality, many mothers are old and physical, and they still have to take care of the next generation for their children. To this end, it is not only necessary to endure the loneliness of leaving home, but also to work hard to adapt to the lifestyle of the daughter-in-law or son-in-law.
If the old man wants to get this feeling of being needed, the body and energy are all right, then there is not much problem. But if she is reluctant, what reason do we have to make such a request? It is better to give her back the freedom and choice of life, and let her choose the life she wants to live.
<h1 class="pgc-h-arrow-right">4． epilogue</h1>
They all said: "Women are weak, but mothers are strong." ”
Everyone will ask the mother to sacrifice herself to complete the child. And women, after becoming mothers, also consciously shoulder such a sacred and heavy mission, allowing themselves to become superhuman in the minds of children.
Fu Seoul once said in "Strange Story": "Superman is the superhero in the child's heart, the dependence in adversity, the light in the dark night, because with her, every dream of the child is sweet." Superman is particularly tired, but as long as I can let my son sleep peacefully at night, I am willing to wear this armor. ”
However, when we define sacrifice and giving as the virtues of a mother, who cares about the needs, preferences, and ideals of a mother as an ordinary person.
Don't wait until the mother is old and gradually becomes a disgusting old woman, we can suddenly find that she is also a child who is afraid of loneliness, a woman who is afraid of aging. What she fears more than this is the burden and burden of being a child.
Let's be her superman, pamper her like a little girl, pamper her, listen to her heart, smooth the folds of her heart, and make the wrinkles of her face full of joy.