01
In this life, we will meet many people, from disgusting villains to good people who help each other.
"The Best of Us" writes: "The stranger is most likely to feel warm and surprised, because you have no expectations of him." The easiest thing to feel chilling and sad is your loved ones because you love them. ”
Perhaps the greatest stupidity of a person is to overestimate one's place in the hearts of others. When you set your mind right and lower your expectations of others, your relationships will be smooth.
No matter who you get along with, seven points are good for people, leaving three points to love yourself; seven points of joy, three points of indifference, feelings have room for maneuver.
02
Husband and wife: Don't change your lover, but change yourself.
The way is that changing oneself is God, and changing others is neurosis.
People are too close to each other, and all problems will bubble up. If it is not pleasing to the eye, it will exist more or less. When in love, people who feel flawless will become "ugly" after marriage.
Habits such as stilted legs, digging nostrils, and throwing things around can be tolerated, and the problem of the three views is intolerable.
In fact, as long as the trivial things are stirred up, they will evolve into "three views are not in harmony." For example, when you go shopping on the street, you have to go to the east to buy clothes, and he insists on going to the west to buy shoes. As long as there is a dispute, it is "incorrigible".
Sanmao once said: "Love will not last long if it does not fall into the real life of dressing, eating, sleeping, and counting money; true love, that is, it is not nervous, that is, it can burp, fart, goug out ears, and run nose without scruples in front of him."
Couples have to live under one roof, for better or worse. Only by improving your own realm, relaxing your mind, and moderately wronging yourself for the sake of long-term feelings, from the beginning, you do not expect the other party to be perfect.
03
Get along with colleagues: can work together and accept intrigue.
In "Dulala Promotion", how can a mediocre Dulala be mixed up in a manager position in a large enterprise and fall in love with his boss?
On the one hand, Dulala is a person who loves to learn, is also good at communicating and coordinating with colleagues, has a sense of cooperation, and when she first arrived at the company, she is very enthusiastic, will not discuss right and wrong, and will not be confused by gossip. No matter how difficult the task, she will accept it and will be able to maintain a positive attitude after hitting a wall.
Dulala, on the other hand, is an ambitious man. She seized the opportunity to interview the company's competition director and showed herself. Also in front of the boss, try to express themselves. Her enthusiasm inevitably has an element of greed.
No matter how strong a person is, if he wants to go to a high place, he must "step on people". If you expect someone to push you, you have to use some thought to win people's hearts.
Cooperation is to win trust and support, intrigue is for profit, and relationships are "double-edged swords".
So you don't want to do nothing in the workplace, you have to take advantage of others. At the same time, you can't expect others to be wholeheartedly on you, and you must not only extend your right hand to shake hands with others, but also use your left hand to hold your own destiny.
04
Get along with friends: the love of helping, not helping is the duty.
Zhihuli, the netizen "Student Party" told such a thing: her boyfriend is in cram school. One day, she bought a cup of milk tea and found three classmates in the cram school, hoping to bring them along. However, two classmates did not even reply to the message, and one returned the message, but kept pushing back.
In life, we often have things that trouble our friends. Friends who are looking forward to traveling to the south will bring some fruits back by the way; friends who work in the north, inquire about the situation at nearby universities, help their children to counsel it; when they go to work, take a ride, etc.
In fact, you just take it for granted, and you don't know that friends also have difficulties. I once went to Changsha and made an appointment with a friend for dinner. As a result, the friend was an hour late. He was very sorry to say that the place of the appointment was in the east, and he lived in the west, and the two places were more than thirty kilometers apart, and that they were both urban roads, often congested.
Expect a friend to help, and have a "it doesn't matter if you succeed or fail", otherwise you may not have a friend.
05
Relatives get along: important occasions can get together, usually less interaction.
More than a decade ago, for my schooling, my mother carried a gift to a cousin who worked in the education department.
Every time the relatives gathered, the cousin would say, "Everyone will come to me later." ”
The mother thought that the cousin would warmly greet the meal, make a lot of reasonable suggestions, or ask acquaintances to solve problems. Unexpectedly, the cousin replied very coldly: "I am very busy, let's talk about it another day." ”
What day is another day? No one knows. Most of them are not enough.
Relatives, have blood relations, but are not obliged to help you. They will only tout their position and money when there are many people, so that you mistakenly think that it is a "reliable tree".
Generally speaking, it is better to go to work in other places than to do things at relatives' homes; relatives get along, and there are also signs of inflammation. Many people who have been pit by relatives will understand this truth.
Relatives who can help you, remember; those who can't help, don't take it seriously. If you're too calculating, it's you who's upset.
06
Conclusion.
Schopenhauer said: "A single man is weak and powerless, like the drifting Robinson, who can accomplish many things only by being with others." ”
Doing a good job in interpersonal relations is a compulsory subject in life. At the same time, you can't put your fate in the hands of others, don't expect others to help you without reservation, even your parents will consider the problem of old-age care and leave some "private money".
True friends, there are many contacts, nothing will evaporate in the world.
True love is to be busy and able to go home on time.
Real relatives, get together every New Year's Festival, send a red envelope, receive a gift, the feast is scattered, and go home separately.
True colleagues, cherish the fate of working together, after leaving, people go tea cold.
True connections are many opportunities to take advantage of each other, and without interests, they are familiar strangers.
You really don't have to expect others to be your savior, people have to cross themselves.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.