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#山哥情感观点系列 #
(Shan Ge talks about emotions, picture from the Internet)
| Wen/Pang Fengshan
Preface
Bill Gates once said: No matter how annoying, don't forget to smile; no matter how anxious, you must pay attention to the tone; no matter how bitter, don't forget to insist; no matter how tired, you must love yourself. If you expect to get it, you have to work hard, and if you don't mind what you hope to get, you will win or lose, and your posture will look good. Life is not a one-way street, a road does not work, you can turn.
In this life, people will never be smooth sailing, just like sailing against the current, if you don't advance, you will retreat.
In the face of many storms and rains in life, in the face of various setbacks in life, the only thing we can do is to keep ourselves in a good state of mind and face the wind and rain, loss and win, gain and loss of the world with a strong heart.
In fact, life itself is the best dialectic, when we always desire to succeed, we fail; when we often hope to win, we also lose.
As someone said:
There is no permanent success and failure in life, life is made up of success and failure. Many people lose their fighting spirit before they have a chance to win.
In fact, the line between winning and losing is often very blurred, winning means having many beautiful things, losing means all negative things that are not satisfactory, in other words, winning is success, losing is failure.
And between winning and losing, I think that whether men or women, the most important thing is to be able to do the three words "afford to lose" and really win.
01
"Emotionally affordable"
I saw a sentence like this on the Internet:
If one day, when you have an argument with someone you love, you let him or her win, then what will he or she win? What do you get? What did you lose? What is lost?
In fact, disputes, in many cases, do not leave any wins and losses, but lose a lot of feelings that should be cherished.
I think this sentence is very good to say, whether it is a man or a woman, in the matter of feelings, there is really no need to win or lose, you know, too real in feelings, it is too unwise.
Many times, feelings and this kind of thing needs two people to complete each other, need to respect each other as guests, need you to care about me, I care about you, what you need is you to respect me a foot, I respect you a foot, rather than calculating who is right and who is wrong.
Of course, whether it is a man or a woman, if you want to win wonderful and beautiful in your feelings, you must first make yourself able to lose, and you can only win if you dare to face losing.
In real life, there are always some people who can't afford to lose emotionally, so some people will be trapped by love, some people will be tired of love, some people will hate because of love, and even some people will be martyred for love, resulting in the tragedy of life.
Just like in "Divine Eagle Hero", Li Moxuan's paranoid love for Lu Zhanyuan, she has been paranoid and crazy in her feelings.
First of all, because of love and hatred, because they can't get each other, they want to retaliate against each other, want to destroy each other, and don't hesitate to take the other party's family to vent their anger, and then pour their anger and pain into the innocent people.
This can be said to be a typical "emotional can not afford to lose", in the end, hurt others, but also buried herself, in the moment she jumped into the fire, it can be said how miserable to lose.
Therefore, whether it is a man or a woman, everyone's emotional path may be full of twists and turns, and it is always necessary to keep yourself rational and sober.
You can only win if you emotionally make yourself "affordable to lose".
02
"Can afford to lose in your career"
Lang Ping said: Sports is a kind of entertainment, and everyone should face winning and losing with a relaxed attitude. Don't always elevate sports to the level of love or patriotism.
For Lang Ping, engaging in the profession of coaching is her life's work, and she has paid too much for it and poured countless efforts.
Among them, she led the Chinese women's volleyball team all the way through thorns, faded, scenery, of course, also lost, also won. This year's participation in the Summer Olympic Games in Tokyo, Japan, there was no impressive result, which inevitably disappointed many fans.
I believe that Lang Ping and all her women's volleyball teammates are afraid that their hearts are more uncomfortable than anyone else, and it is inevitable that there will be unspeakable helplessness and pain.
But many times it is like this, whether it is sports, volleyball, or other, as a profession and career that they are engaged in, who dares to guarantee that it will always be brilliant, successful, and will always be in a winning state?
According to the law of development of things, there will always be failures and mistakes, just as the so-called feng shui takes turns, especially in the Olympic games, this uncertainty is even more unpredictable and controlled.
To this end, Lang Ping stressed that sports is a kind of entertainment, and people should face wins and losses with a more relaxed mentality, saying both her own sincere words and truth, but also showing her attitude towards winning and losing.
From this level, she must be a person who can "afford to lose" in her career, otherwise, she would not lead the Chinese women's volleyball team to win again and again on the field and achieve so many hard-won gains and glory.
In fact, which win is not based on "affordability to lose"?
Therefore, whether men or women, fighting in the career is a mentality, you can only "win" if you can "afford to lose".
Winning is certainly gratifying, but losing is also necessary to be calm.
Sometimes, no matter what kind of career a person is engaged in, between winning and losing, there is no eternal winner, only a "loser" who never gives up.
Therefore, both men and women, as long as you make yourself "affordable to lose", you will also win.
03
"You can afford to lose in life"
Someone once said that the meaning of a person's life is not what to conquer, but how to struggle wonderfully.
That is to say, when people live, it is more important than the process, not the result. In fact, in the end, everyone is the same, that is, to disappear from the earth.
If you pay attention to the process of life, it will be different, and you will not talk about heroes in terms of success or failure, and you will pay more attention to the wonderfulness of the process.
In fact, life is only once, and life is an experience, both men and women, in life do not take winning and losing too seriously, when you can make yourself "afford to lose" in life, you win.
Because, to some extent, everyone's life is originally made up of countless successes and losses and wins and losses, large and small.
If we can't afford to lose, it will be difficult for us to keep moving forward in the long river of life.
If life is a journey, we must be a decent traveler, we must have the courage and courage that a traveler should have, and only those who have the courage to take the risk of the journey can reach the victory of life.
Among them, when encountering adversity, in the face of uncertain wins and losses, we must remind ourselves that we must be able to lose, and even endure and endure, and then encourage ourselves to come up with more courage and confidence, light up the light of hope, and then illuminate our own future, to see every place we want to go.
Both men and women should understand that life is like this, and the meaning of life is not to stick to it, but to open up and develop their own meaning of life.
In the whole process of pioneering, we will certainly have gains and losses, and we will win and lose, but as long as we make ourselves "afford to lose", we will win.
After all, the dialectic of life and the philosophy of life have long told us that there is no happiness in life without suffering, no gain without loss, and no win without losing.
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About the Author:
Brother Shan, an emotional columnist with temperature and attitude, hopes to warm and accompany every lonely heart with the words of the heart!