In ancient feudal society, the wife of an ordinary man had no guarantees, not only would he and his children be oppressed for generations, but he might also lose his personal freedom and be enslaved and bullied by rich families at any time. Even women from aristocratic and official families would fall into a precarious situation from time to time, killing people. The male protagonist outside and the female protagonist have a long history in China.
As long as men in ancient times had capital, it was still easy to spend money. Because in ancient times, it was "monogamous and polygamous concubines", after a man married a regular wife, he could also marry multiple concubines, as well as buy maids and singers. Even if you run to the flower street willow lane to go to the wind, others will not care too much, these are allowed by social ethics.
In ancient times, large families often had multiple wives and concubines. In costume dramas, we often hear people call the man's wife "big wife", who is responsible for the affairs and financial power of the whole family.
However, in ancient times, a man could only have one wife, who was the husband's official spouse and had the highest legal status among his wives and concubines. Men who marry their wives have to go through a series of formal procedures, such as "parental orders" and "matchmakers' words", holding procedures from natsai to kissing, and also meeting uncles and sacrificing family temples.
In this way, the wives that ming media are marrying are protected by the state etiquette law in terms of fame and treatment, and have a status that cannot be reached by concubines. Concubines are different, called "concubines" and "buy concubines", which means that the wife tolerates her husband to put concubines into the room as her own substitute team. Although many men in ancient times privately accepted concubines, in the principle of etiquette, the right wife had the right to decide whether to accept concubines or not.
The family status of husbands, wives, and concubines
Many people think that polygamy in ancient Chinese history is actually wrong. Most of the ancient times were practiced polygamous concubines. Although in ancient times, men were superior to women, but the status of the right wife was also quite high, so from the emperor to the common people, there were many wives in history. Why was the status of the wives so high in ancient times, but they could tolerate their husbands taking concubines? In addition, many friends feel that concubines are equivalent to the "little wives" of the ancients, or "little three" and "second milk" and other unnamed extramarital affairs, which is also imprecise. The ancient saying "concubines are not as good as wives", in ancient times, the status of concubines was more like a close maid, and she hardly had any rights and interests of "wives", but she had to fulfill the same duties as her wife.
For example, the "wife" takes care of the husband's children and serves the elderly, while the concubine also has these duties. However, in front of her husband and lady Zhengfang, the status of a concubine was like that of a maid. We see in film and television works that concubines and the main room turn their faces and fight, which basically does not happen in reality. Once a similar situation arises, it must be the concubines of low status who suffer.
Written in the Zhou Dynasty's I Ching Yun: "The female is in the inner position, the male is in the outer position, the male and female are righteous, and the great righteousness of heaven and earth is also." This passage shows that the pattern of "male outside and female inside" has begun to take shape at least in the Zhou Dynasty.
From the point of view of etiquette, the children born of concubines are called Shuzi, and they can only be called "aunts" to their own biological mothers, and "master mothers" to their father's wives. In "Dream of the Red Chamber", Aunt Zhao's children Jia Huan and Tan Chun have no status in Jia Province, and Lady Wang has repeatedly belittled their mother and son around Jia Mu.
Ancient families practiced patriarchal patriarchy. The patriarchal patriarch is in a supreme position in the family, with the right to control property, the right to marry, and the right to decree, and the wives and concubines and children are subordinate to the parents. To sum up, it is the "father for the son and the husband for the wife" in the "three programs and five constants" in the feudal era. Although the husband and wife are equal in name, they are "husband and wife" on the outside and inferior to the wife on the inside. The wife must take the husband as the guideline and be subject to the husband's control. In the case of marital status, for example, the wife must observe monogamy, while the man can take concubines in addition to his wife. The sentence is lighter if the husband harms his wife and heavier if the wife causes harm to her husband.
Legally, the wife had considerable power in ancient times. The Tang Laws stipulate that if a husband treats his wife as a concubine, he will serve two years in prison. If a concubine is treated as a concubine, the sentence is one and a half years. Moreover, when returning from serving the sentence, the wife is still a wife, and the concubine is still a concubine, and the status cannot be changed in the slightest.
However, the wife's inferior position is only relative to the husband. Most of the ancients practiced polygamy. In other words, in a large family, there is only one wife. Therefore, marrying a wife is a very important thing, pay attention to the door to the door, the media is marrying, the process is solemn and cumbersome. Specifically, it is divided into six steps: Na Cai, Qing Ming, Na Ji, Na Zheng, Please Period, and Kiss and Greet, also known as "Six Rites", which are indispensable. Generally speaking, the larger the family and the higher the door, the more exquisite the marriage of men in the family.
Therefore, for the concubines, domestic servants and descendants of the family, the wife is a respected relative whose status is second only to that of the husband, and is also in a relatively respectful position. This situation continued until the end of the Qing Dynasty, and even the beginning of the People's Republic. As the hostess of a large family, in the case where the man is mainly responsible for the outside world, many internal affairs of the family are naturally controlled by the wife.
Concubines are in the family, and they have a husband and wife with their husbands, but they do not have the name of husband and wife. The "Yu Shi Mingyan" tells such a story: a small official Jia Shi, with a servant to Hangzhou Qiantang, passed by Wang Xiaosi's door, wanted to stop and rest, and shouted outside the door: "Is there anyone in the house?" This woman (Wang Xiaosi's wife), although jingchao cloth skirt, but a charming appearance, looks like "with his stupidity also dissipated, the situation is easy to move." Jia Shi looked stunned and wanted to buy it as a concubine, and Wang Xiaosi promised to explain that he was worth 40 taels of silver. Jia Shi was overjoyed, and immediately invited the village teacher to write a deed to sell his wife, and the two sides landed a letter and a drawing on it, and Wang Xiaosi sold his wife to Jia Shi.
It can be seen that concubinage is arbitrary. Concubines mainly have two functions: one is to satisfy the physical desires of the male master; the other is to give birth to children for the male master's family. Just like the third wife Mei Shan in the novel "A Flock of Wives and Concubines", she said: "It's not like this, there is nothing to hide and hide, if you don't add a person to the Chen family, the hard days will be behind, and we are all the same thing." "Because they were bought and considered part of the family property, concubines had a lower status, could not enter the family tree like their wives, could not participate in family sacrifices, and could not raise their children themselves. Moreover, once out of favor or the man dies, he is likely to face the fate of being re-bought and sold.
First of all, this status is the status of the queen in the palace, what kind of position is the queen? We can see that the queen can be sacrificed in the front, Zhen Huan and these people can only kneel in the back to listen, the queen can drink and feast with the monarch on a big day, these people can only eat and drink and laugh in the back, the two people are husband and wife, and the others are foils. What is more important is the heir, the queen's birth, is the concubine, look at the comparison between Baoyu and the children produced by the aunt, you can know how high the status of the wife is. The second is the protection of status, many people do not know, in ancient times there was also a marriage, this appointment is the letter of appointment, this is a good proof, to prove the identity of this wife. Other people don't have this, and if there are, they are also one, but the wife is hired by three media and six, which means something that has been proved by many people. This is also a ritual convention in ancient times. Only the wife enjoys this treatment, and no one else can.
Lin Chong of "Water Margin" is the so-called "800,000 Forbidden Army Sect Leader", a middle-level officer, who still can't keep his own wife, only because this "magnate" in Gao Yanei has taken a fancy to her, and finally his family is broken and he has to force liangshan, which is an excellent example.
Another example is the Anshi Rebellion, when Zhang Tour was alone in Suiyang City, his concubine was killed and divided into food, after all, this poor woman still won the pity of countless literati and inkers for thousands of years, and also deduced for her a variety of words and legends that responded to Zhang Tour's entry karma, such as the Qing Dynasty's Yuyangshanren's "Zhang Patrol Concubine Reincarnation Claim".
And the wives of millions of ordinary people who died tragically during the same period, such as the woman who was arrested and sent to join the army that Du Fu met in the entry of Shi Trench Village, are even just a string of figures that no one cares about in the history books...
Even in the prosperous world of taiping, "mortal wives" can also be tied up by "mortals" with a straw rope at any time, and then pawned and sold, after all, they cannot escape the fate of arbitrarily slaughtering for the rich family and becoming a rich concubine or even a maid.
As for the so-called provisions of the ancient law that guarantee the rights of wives: what is the misunderstanding of the actual enforcement of the law at that time? The Book of Han has a cloud: "Marrying a wife and selling a child, the law cannot be forbidden, and righteousness cannot be stopped." 】
Female governance is mainly to handle household chores, similar to serving in-laws and husbands, raising children, and being a female celebrity. Sadly, for a husband, his favorite is often not a wife, but a concubine.
What is even more tragic is that in the ancient family, although the wife was a noble mother, she did not have her own property in the strict sense, even if the dowry she brought from her mother's family, although she had nominal ownership, was not free to deal with it specifically.
In the Tang Law, on the one hand, it is stipulated that the wife can independently dispose of the property obtained from the mother's family, and the woman can take away the dowry after the marriage relationship is over, on the other hand, it stipulates that women are prohibited from "storing private property", and then considering the weak position of women in marriage, they are severely restricted in taking the initiative to end the marriage, and this independent domination is only the moon in the water and the flowers in the fog. The Song Law followed the Tang Law, stipulating that the husband and wife should jointly preside over the property of the wife; it was not illegal for the husband to sell his wife's makeup and land property; if the wife wanted to pawn the makeup and land property, the husband should also come forward to make a deed.
Although there is no ownership, as a mother, the wife still has a certain amount of real power in the daily affairs of the family, specifically managing people, managing affairs and managing money. Madame Wang in "Dream of the Red Chamber" and Yu Ru in "A Flock of Wives and Concubines", although on the surface they both eat and pray buddhas and do not ask about the world, but in fact they both control the core power of the housekeeper. This management power is also limited to the daily consumption within the family, not the entire family property.
Take Wang Xifeng in "Dream of the Red Chamber" as an example, as Madame Wang's agent, she controls the large and small affairs of the Rongguo Mansion, from the distribution of monthly money, the collection of materials to the contracting of projects in the Grand View Garden, all within her management, and she truly plays the role of "big wife". The third time, on the occasion of the first meeting with Daiyu, Wang Xifeng was initially shown as the management content of the family. Madame Wang asked her if the monthly money had been spared. Sister Feng replied that the monthly money had been released, and she had just taken someone to the back upstairs to look for satin, looking for this half a day, and she had not seen what the wife said yesterday.
The twenty-third time, Jia Lian wanted to do something for her nephew Jia Yun in front of Sister Feng. Sister Feng replied, on the northeast corner of the garden, Niangniang said, also called duoduo planting pine trees, downstairs also called planting some flowers and plants, waiting for this matter to come out, I manage to call Yun'er to manage this project. On the twenty-fourth occasion, Wang Xifeng did indeed give Jia Yun the project of planting flowers and plants in the Grand View Garden. This incident shows that in internal affairs, the authority of the hostess is greater, and it is not easy to speak like Jia Lian.
In terms of stewardship, in addition to the servants in the household, it also includes the "concubines" who manage the husband's na. Wives can beat and scold concubines at will, reduce them to slaves who cook miscellaneous meals, and sell concubines at will. Lu Rong of the Ming Dynasty recorded such an incident in his book "Miscellaneous Records of Shuyuan".
Yu Qinyu, a native of Suzhou, was the son of Yu Shiyue, the Shangshu of the Punishment Department, and married his wife Qiu Shiyue. Qin Yu was quite knowledgeable, but he was light and lustful, and publicly placed seven concubines on the pretext that Qiu Shi had no children. As a proper wife, although Qiu Shi did not obstruct her husband from taking concubines, and even treated concubines quite "kindly", she strictly guarded against these concubines. The concubines come and go in and out of the room every morning and evening, and they all have moderation... During the Chenghua years, Yu Qinyu toured the capital and died in the home of a prostitute in the Church. As a result, as soon as the funeral was completed, only the two concubines who had sons were left, and the others were sent to remarry.
In terms of managing money, in addition to the daily expenses of the family, the financial rights of the wife also include the inheritance of the husband's inheritance.
After the death of the husband, the "exclusive" status he previously enjoyed in the family was naturally inherited by the wife, including the economic management of the entire family. In The Legend of Cui Yingying, Cui Yingying's mother, Zheng Shi, is a widow in charge of the family's economic power. In "Jin Ping Mei", after Ximen Qing's death, his wife Wu Yueniang remarried Meng Yulou and Ban Jinlian was expelled from the house, exercising the right to dispose of her husband's property. The Tang Law stipulates that whoever dwells together must have a superior, and the superior is present, and the descendants have nothing to specialize in. The "honorable elder" here, after the death of his father, is naturally a widowed mother. At the same time, it is also stipulated that if the parents are in the household registration and divide the family property, they will be listed as the crime of "filial piety", and the offender will be "three years in prison".
Strictly speaking, the wife's inheritance of her husband's inheritance belongs to the ancient Confucian "three subordinates" for housewives, that is, from the father, from the husband, and from the son, that is, the actual inheritance rights are on the son's side, and the wife is only in charge of the son. However, before the children can establish a family, the widowed mother becomes the de facto custodian of the family property. Moreover, in ancient times, when "orderly longevity and childhood" and "filial piety" were emphasized, even if the children became adults, the actual power was still in the hands of widowed mothers.
Of course, the wife can inherit the inheritance of her husband, provided that she fulfills the obligation of raising the child and cannot remarry before the child reaches adulthood. Even if the children remarry when they reach adulthood, the property they have inherited before must be returned to the husband's family. This shows that what is inherited here is still the right to manage, not the ownership. Many people know that the status of the wife is very high, but there is one thing, that is, it may be because she has no children, or even nothing, resulting in her pampering much less than the concubines in the future, because these concubines have only one role, that is, to serve their own masters, and the other is to give birth to children, to extend heirs, which is the biggest role of concubines, if there is nothing, then a lot of pampering is gone. If so, the status will be improved. The Western Zhou dynasty ritual system stipulates that a man who is twenty years old "crowns and lists her husbands" (pulls all his hair to the top of his head to form a bun, and wears a small hat to protect the bun "crown"), indicating adulthood. For women, the age of fifteen is "Hezhen" (also combing her hair into a bun hanging behind her head), and it is for adulthood ("Spring and Autumn Valley Liang Chuan Wengong Twelve Years"). Men and women who have not reached the age of majority may not marry.
In the Western Zhou Dynasty, when marriage was concluded, both men and women must strictly obey the orders of their parents and matchmakers. "Etiquette and Qu Li": "Men and women do not have a matchmaker"; "Men and women are not mediated, and they are not well-known". However, there are exceptions to the conclusion of marriages, such as the Confucian etiquette system, which stipulates that children should serve three years of mourning after the death of parents, during which time they may not marry to show filial piety.
In a way, the power of the "big lady" is naturally formed.
First of all, the marriage of the ancients was an important means of showing off, acquiring, and consolidating the family's political and economic status, with a strong utilitarian nature. On the surface, marriage is a matter for two people, but in fact it is related to the two families represented behind the two people. In the context of such a mission, the personal love of men and women is secondary. It is recorded in the "Cautionary Tales" that Wang Ye knew that his son Wang Jinglong liked Yutang Chun, and out of comprehensive considerations, he married him to the Liu clan of the famous eunuch clan. With such a mother's family behind, the wife's waist bar is naturally much harder.
Secondly, it is related to the ancient succession system of concubines. Before the Shang Dynasty, the order of succession to the throne was more chaotic, like Xia Yu when he was critically ill and let his assistant Bo Yi take over the throne, Bo Yi felt that his ability was not as good as Yu's son Qi, and Qi eventually became the second generation of Xia's king. At the end of the Shang Dynasty and the beginning of the Zhou Dynasty, the system of succession by the eldest son of the concubine was gradually established. The eldest son is again based on the system of wives, rather than simply according to the order of birth. After that, this patriarchal inheritance system was gradually popularized in feudal society, and was supported and adopted by successive rulers. Like Li Shimin's concubine Empress Changsun's son Li Chengqian, he was made crown prince. Yin Chu, born to Kangxi's empress Dowager Hesheri, was made crown prince, although not the eldest son. Folk practices are similar to those of the royal family, and they also pay attention to the fact that mothers are more expensive than their children, and the status of concubines is naturally much higher than that of other concubines.
Third, from the perspective of the wife herself, as a woman from a large family, whether it is her education level or her usual circle of knowledge and communication, she is incomparable to the daughter of a commoner family. In "Dream of the Red Chamber", Dai Yu, Bao Chao, Xiang Yun, Tan Chun and others, who can chant poems and paint, can manage the council, and have been cultivated according to the standards of "big wives" since childhood. Even if like Sister Feng, who can't read a few big characters, but playing small and mixed with several male brothers in Jia Fu, not only has a high appearance, "the speech is smooth and sharp, the heart is extremely deep and detailed, and it is a man who is impossible to match." ”
In the Tang Dynasty, there was a famous scholar named Du You, who straightened out his concubine after losing his wife in his later years, because this behavior was ostracized and accused by Shilin. Even after death, the status of wives and concubines is still not equal, and wives have the right to be buried with their husbands and have the same coffin, but concubines cannot enjoy such treatment.
It can be seen that the concubines in ancient times are by no means equivalent to the current "little wives", and their status is quite miserable.
All in all, in the ancient society with male power as the core, whether a woman is a wife or a concubine, she lacks independent personality and self-awareness, and is only an appendage of men. The little power of the "big lady" eventually evolved into a farce and tragedy of "why women are embarrassed by women".