"Those Chinese intellectually retarded, as well as Alibaba fools, will invest in my movies, and those who drive their own yachts to Cannes for the sake of the young model!"
The man who said this was Uve Bauer, who called himself "the only genius in the world of directing."
He is a Germanic fighting master of boxing film critics, winner of the Golden Plum Lifetime Achievement Award, and the black hand of the game adaptation that makes Blizzard president shiver.
In a word: he is recognized, the most live and hot film director.
He is best known for a crime action film called Invasion of Wall Street, his first to break a 6 on IMDB.
Three years ago, Bauer's anti-social B-movie, Fury 3: Knock Down the President, failed in Kickstarter crowdfunding because no one wanted to waste money on garbage.
Ball didn't do it, and he immediately recorded a small video and fired a map cannon at Hollywood and movie fans around the world:
"Marvel, Reunion, Downey, and the U.S. team are all hot chickens, and the fans are all mentally retarded without vision." George Clooney, Brad Pitt, matt Damon are all stupid X.
Jennifer Lopez is a disgruntled Mexican Pool. ”
Because of his lack of mouth, the Western media gave him a graceful name - Raging Boll, referred to as "Wu Bao".
Not long ago, Wu Bao, who had already announced the end of the shadow, also touched the porcelain "Furious Beast" and brushed a wave of existence.
Both Rampage and Rampage are called "Rampage", the latter adapted from an old arcade game, while the former is purely a wanton venting of Ubao's antisocial personality.
The theme of the Fury series is to kill the rich. It tells the story of a heavily armed terrorist who stages a live-action version of GTA on American soil, massacring civilians and capitalists indiscriminately.
Wu Bao portrayed this terrorist as a hero who "substituted for Skywalker", and as long as it was a star, politician, and business tycoon that Wu Bao was not accustomed to, he had to receive a box lunch.
And the reason why Wu Bao touched the porcelain "Raging Beast" is:
"'Raging Beast' has the same name as my film, which damages my IP and affects my future income. Most importantly, "Raging Beast" is a hot chicken popcorn movie, and my "Fury" is a profound warning fable! ”
Wu Bao then threatened Warner, and if he didn't change his name, we would see him...
It's not the first time that Oobao has done this, and a few months ago he also touched the porcelain "The Phantom Seamstress", saying that the poster nakedly copied his "Vampire Lane", a 4-point Rotten Tomatoes game adaptation.
But then again, there's a reason why Ubao protects "Fury", after all, this is the only movie he can watch that is recognized by the outside world.
Other works...
Yes, most of Ubao's films are game adaptations — Vampire Lane, Haunted House, House of the Dead, and Dungeon Siege are all he's wasted IPs.
No matter how good the original game is, in the hands of Wu Bao, it can "turn magic into decay".
So much so that when Ubao found the president of Blizzard and proposed to direct "Warcraft", the latter was frightened and trembling. He immediately said, "We will never sell the rights to warcraft movies, especially not to you...
This curtain friend, I heard that you recently played "Far Cry 5", Ah, Wu Bao's "Far Cry" movie to understand.
Don't like it, there is also a "Dungeon Siege" starring Guoda Statham... Hey, don't take it...
Oobao also changed the most infamous "killing simulator" game in history, "Streets of Blood", into a movie called "Postal Terrorist", from which bin Laden and Bush joined hands to run a well-off GIF.
To be honest, this black comedy I personally think is quite funny, but when the editor of the foreign media magazine posted the diss movie, Wu Bao once again launched the taunt skill:
"You (the editor) are a talentless and unspecified bag, and if you don't become a director, you will only be a keyboard man... Go home to Ganlinniang, after all, she has cooked you for 30 years, and you should also "treat" her..."
However, this is not the lower limit of Ubao...
In 2006, the war between Ubbo and the film critics burned to the boxing ring, and he gave the diss to all the film critics who had dissed him, and wanted to have an inter-provincial solo with the sunspots, including Quentin.
Externally, Wu Bao disguised the boxing match as a public relations campaign called "Don't BB if you can do it".
When the 4 film critics selected by him stepped into the boxing ring, they found that the Germanic rogue opposite them actually played the real game.
Okay, welcome to the "if you can do it, don't BB" boxing championship, now the game has entered the white-hot stage, under the gaze of 600 spectators, Wu Bao was possessed by ali, Rocky, and Chunli souls at this moment.
The Germanic blood flowing through his body filled the gas tank at this moment, and the film critics without keyboard protectors were KO One by one.
The game is over! The game is over! Wu Bao defended the dignity of the directors of bad films with his fists, and Dr. Bi Zhifei rushed excitedly outside the field, he was not alone in the battle! He's not alone!
Afterwards, we learned that Ubao was a ten-year-old amateur boxer, and when asked if you were a little rude, Ubao replied:
"I gave them a 3-month preparation period, but I can't blame them..."
Wu Bao, you can fight so well, it just so happens that "Raging Monster" has harmed your interests, do you want to have a boxing match with Dwee Wrestling Johnson? What are you shaking, WWE is acting, not afraid not to be afraid.
The move infuriated fans around the world, who launched a petition campaign in 2008 to demand that Ubao leave the class.
Wu Bao let out a harsh word: "As long as the petition reaches 1 million, I will automatically withdraw from the group." ”
The boss of Xuanmai chewing gum also came to rub the heat, and at the same time released a harsh word: "As long as it reaches 1 million in a week, every participant has a free Xuanmai!" ”
In response, Ubao himself launched a "Long Live Ubao" petition campaign, calling on his fans to vote.
As of 2012, "Wubao Class" had more than 350,000 votes, while "Long Live Wubao" had only more than 7,600 votes...
Seeing this, you may have to ask, Uvi Bauer's film is so bad, where did he get the money to make the next one? The answer is that he drilled loopholes in the German tax code.
With the lapse of the tax law in 2006, belated justice was finally coming.
Although Wu Bao was still tireless after that, without the protection of the tax law and the face of the black man, he had to raise funds through crowdfunding if his credit was overdrawn.
With the failure of the "Fury 3" crowdfunding (less than $50,000), Wubao, who has failed three consecutive crowdfunding attempts, has officially ended.
Before leaving the group, I didn't forget to laugh at Hollywood, capitalism, and the hot chicken audience that sprayed his films, that is, I had the video I mentioned at the beginning.
"Rage 3: Knock down the president" was finally made, in this movie, Wu Bao incarnated as a terrorist full of firepower, recreated an "American Dream" with extreme violence, and launched a holy war at the end, cynical to perverted.
Making trolls with heart and making movies with his feet, Wu Bao dissed the whole world and was ridiculed by the whole world.
However, Wu Bao's movies are not all bad movies without highlights, at least when I learned that "Postal Terrorist" and "Fury" were directed by Wu Bao.
And Wu Bao is also a doctor of literature, which is a bit similar to Dr. Bi Zhifei, the director of "Dream Showbiz".
More like this, two pretentious geniuses still think, "It's not me who's wrong, it's the world."
After the film, Wu Bao opened a restaurant in Vancouver and declared: "I am now making enough money to play golf for the rest of my life." ”
But Ubao is always ubao, but whenever someone "plagiarizes" his movie, the troll's occupational disease will attack, but there are fewer and fewer people who are willing to take care of him.
After tossing and turning for so many years, this audience slowly understood that for such a "sharp-skinned, thick-bellied clown" jumping beam.
No matter how you diss him, Ubao's response will always be only one...