People in the transitional period of the Republic of China seem to have a sense of separation, openness and conservatism are always two sides at the same time, such as Ding Ling, who changed her boyfriend countless times in the early years, but did not recognize ding ling in her later years, such as Guo Moruo, who exchanged with countless talented women on the one hand, but also guarded the wife with small feet on the other side, and for example, Su Xuelin, Su Xuelin's separation, not only in the first half of her life to promote Lu Xun, the second half of her life to belittle Lu Xun, but also in her marriage, then what is her marriage story?
In 1897, Su Xuelin was born in Zhejiang, where the literary scope is strong, and it may be precisely because of this, although the family belongs to the family that believes that women are talentless and virtuous, at the age of 7, he insisted on going to a private school, and later because he wanted to go to primary school, he did not hesitate to threaten tears and suicide, and in 1915, he was successfully admitted to the Anqing Provincial Junior Girls' Normal School, and after graduation, he became a teacher in the primary school attached to his alma mater, which was a preliminary escape from the traditional fate with a passion.
But her marriage is a typical arranged, the other party is the second son of the businessman Zhang Yusan Zhang Baoling, although he does not seem to be raised by machismo, not only in the United States MIT study, read or shipbuilding, how to think is already fashionable, and the same is born in 1897, but also can not hide that in essence this is not through Su Xuelin set, which makes her extremely disgusted, making her shackled unhappy agreement.
So she desperately used learning to get rid of, in 1919 she and her family said that they wanted to continue their studies, did not want to be a primary school teacher all their lives, and through a fight, she was admitted to the Chinese Literature Department of Beijing Women's Higher Normal School, just grasped the tail of the May Fourth Movement, new women like her were quickly trained, with the help of teachers and friends, they secretly went to France to study in 1921, feeling the so-called liberal and romantic atmosphere.
But what is surprising is that Su Xuelin has not become free and romantic, she still has a lot of feudal traditional morality, one of the most obvious of which is "foolish filial piety", because her mother has paid a lot for her to go to school, so although she hates her marriage, she has never violated her mother's ideas, and when she is in France, she obviously has a lover who is more in line with herself, but she rejects everyone, so that her marriage is doomed to be a tragedy.
In 1925, Su Xuelin's mother was critically ill and asked her to marry Zhang Baoling immediately, in fact, before one of them had written a letter in the United States and one in France, and found that they were not suitable for each other, but neither of them used all their strength to break free of this bondage, reluctantly combined, and after a few months, her mother died of illness, and the two went to Shanghai together and began a new life that was not smooth.
Su Xuelin is a typical literati, although he is not very romantic, but he yearns for romance, the next rain, a sun, must write poetry, express his views, ask the people around him to follow along, but Zhang Baoling is a typical engineering student, Su Xuelin said: "Tonight's moon is really round." He would reply, "I didn't draw a circle with a compass." Su Xuelin was so angry that he immediately threw away his hand and walked away.
In addition, in terms of human sophistication, Zhang Baoling is obviously more indifferent and rational, Su Xuelin will take out about 20 yuan every month to subsidize his eldest sister and sister-in-law, Zhang Baoling does not want her to do this, and he does not want her to tell him every time he does this, so he is very annoyed, Su Xuelin feels that this money is his own income, has the right to deal with it himself, Zhang Baoling is too narrow-minded and stingy, so the two began a cold war again.
Interestingly, the above are all the words of the Su Xuelin family, is Zhang Baoling not romantic? In fact, his romance is silent, at first Su Xuelin had to let Zhang Baoling and her teach in a school, Zhang Baoling agreed, gave up his favorite engineering career, ran to Suzhou Soochow University, until he and Su Xuelin found that each other was not suitable after a year, he returned to the Shanghai shipyard, that is to say, he worked hard for her.
Is Zhang Baoling really angry because Su Xuelin subsidizes his eldest sister-in-law? Zhang Baoling's salary is actually quite rich, will not care about his wife's 20 yuan, what is important is that later he has no objection to living with Su Xuelin's eldest sister, nephew, niece, her eldest sister cooks and washes dishes, Su Xuelin repairs and repairs the cottage, Zhang Baoling splits firewood and sweeps, everyone has a clear division of labor, and life is simple and pure.
How to say, Su Xuelin is dissatisfied with herself being shackled by feudal marriage, and vented her dissatisfaction on Zhang Baoling, so she looks at him without pleasing anything, the whole person is simply contradictory, for example, Zhang Baoling specially built a small western-style building in the shape of a steamer for them, where she happily wrote the prose collection "Green Sky" and "Thorn Heart", but turned her head and said that it was uncomfortable, disliked, and typically wrong.
Later Zhang Baoling also annoyed her, after 36 years of marriage, they really got along for less than 5 years, the marriage relationship existed in name only, never slept together, naturally there were no children, especially after the victory of the Anti-Japanese War Zhang Baoling returned to Shanghai, these two people basically never met again, someone asked the 102-year-old Su Xuelin why is this, she told the truth: "I have literary scholarship, why should I get married?" ”
But is literary scholarship really the truth? In fact, Su Xuelin is too divided attitude, she is willing to learn a few twists and turns, willing to sacrifice herself, but also read so many books, understand so many new ideas, but - "always feel that the word divorce for women, is always indecent, in fact, at that time I already have a thin literary name, in the past suffered a lot of humiliation, if my name is published in the newspaper, let those good reporters to brush me straight, really feel is not a taste." ”
Just as the so-called "when the break is continuous, but also subject to its chaos", Su Xuelin also began to introspect and regret later - "calling Zhang Baoling a lonely life, can not enjoy his ideal family happiness, and really feel sorry for him" "I am sorry for Zhang Baoling, I can't take care of him, and I left him alone on the mainland", but Zhang Baoling died in the 50s, Su Xuelin lived until 1999, these words, too late for too long.