I'm Nepali, penniless and went to China to marry a daughter-in-law and have two babies, and I found out how lucky I was after many years

Interviews with real people

2024-06-27 20:35

This is the 4,142nd real story we have told

Years ago, I was written into a book by a TV reporter, and I became popular all over China, and I was favored by LaLa.

Penniless and alone, I flew to Hebei, China, and married Lala very easily and happily. It wasn't until five years later that I realized how lucky a Nepali man I was.

(Our happy family of four)

My name is Babu, Nepalese, post-80s, nickname: Babu of Nepal's Fujia, is an indigenous Newali and a native of Kathmandu. I have an older brother and a younger brother, three sisters and a younger sister, a total of seven siblings.

Dad worked for a construction company and supported our family. Mom is a housewife who runs our daily lives. The cost of living in Nepal is low, and Dad's salary is enough to support our whole family, and we don't feel tight.

(My family of origin)

After graduating from junior high school, I was admitted to a technical secondary school and majored in accounting. By the time I was in my second year, I had found a job in charge of the hostel business and assisting the owner in the jewelry business.

At that time, I was very interested in the identification of rough jewelry and design. Work takes up most of my time, and I can't juggle my studies at all. After careful consideration, I decided to give up my studies and continue working when I was 18 years old.

I wanted to learn this craft for 10 years, and it turned out that I was the right choice.

(We are a family with our parents)

Nepal has a rich mineral belt and contains a lot of ores, such as Himalayan white crystal, tourmaline (Tourmaline), and lapis lazuli (Lapis), which have been very hot in the past two years. There are also rubies, sapphires, emeralds, opals, peridots, turquoise, topaz and others brought by Indian merchants.

Among them, emeralds and tourmalines are of the best quality, and the clarity and price are very gratifying, not only suitable for jewelry but also as collectibles, so there are naturally many merchants who do jewelry business.

Of course, there are also many rough stones imported from abroad, and after cutting, you can see the quality of the gems inside, according to the quality of the gemstones, whether to make bracelets or rings gold or silver settings.

(Me and Lala)

For experts, it is easy to tell the difference between good and bad jewelry, but the choice of rough is crucial and requires a professional eye.

The reason why I can easily distinguish the rough is based on more than 20 years of experience. Ordinary people can basically recognize it after only three years of training.

At the company I work for, once the gemstone style is designed, the workers can make it according to the design. I assisted my boss in buying rough stones and making finished products, and the business was doing quite well.

(Our Leisure Time)

In 2009, I hosted a reporter from China's Anhui Economic Television. She stayed in our hostel, I treated her to tea, talked to her a few times, and took her on some tours.

Who would have thought that after she returned to China, she would write a travelogue, which mentioned me and the hotel where I worked, and published several photos of my work.

Later, the travelogue was published as a travel book. With the sale of books, an endless stream of Chinese came to Nepal to stay at the hotel where I worked, and asked me for autographs.

At that time, I didn't expect that I would become a celebrity overnight, and I was quite flattered to become popular all over China at once. It was the highlight of my life.

(This travelogue made me an internet celebrity)

Lala and her best friend also came to Kathmandu because they saw this guidebook.

She met me a few times, and we got to know each other. It was New Year's Day 2010 when Lala invited me to a New Year's party at the Shangri-La Hotel, where she was staying.

At the time, my mom was hospitalized with a cerebral hemorrhage, and I wasn't going to attend the party. Lala said to me, "You come to this New Year's party, and then I'll go with you to the hospital and visit your mom. ”

I was attracted to her and was touched by what she had to say. There were so many foreigners there, and only she wanted to visit my mother in the hospital, and I felt that she had a heart of gold.

At that moment, I felt that I was in love with her, and I had promised my life at the first meeting!

(Lala and I and her girlfriends)

The next day, she visited my mom as promised. We spent a few days together and quickly established a relationship. Lala is going back to China, and we have made an appointment for her to come back to Nepal next time.

She came back to China, and I would find time to talk to her on the phone every day. The following year, she came to Nepal again for a month. I brought Lala home and officially introduced her to her parents.

Unexpectedly, my parents did not approve of me marrying her, mainly because she was a foreigner. Mom said, "You can't marry a foreigner, most foreigners get divorced very quickly after they get married, how can the result be good?" ”

I have my own firm thoughts, and I know Lala is different.

(Lala and I are married)

At the same time, my boss and lady didn't want me to find a Chinese woman as a wife, because they knew that Chinese people were very good at doing business.

If I marry LaLa, with my professional ability and Lala's mind, I will definitely start my own business, and they have a sense of crisis, so they will also block it.

In Nepal, my parents rely on the eldest son, and I am the second son. Comparatively, parents have a little less control. I have more freedom, and as long as I persevere, I have the opportunity to follow my own heart.

Despite the opposition of my parents, I accompanied Lala to prepare all the necessary documents for marriage and registered my marriage in Nepal.

(Let's start a new life together)

When a man marries a man in Nepal, his parents give the woman at least 50-60 grams of gold and hold a wedding feast. My parents didn't approve of our marriage, so they didn't give me any gold.

I was obsessed with my decision, bought a plane ticket, and flew to China penniless, with a lonely heart.

We decided to have a wedding in China because I didn't speak Chinese and it was my first time in China, I couldn't do anything, and the wedding was arranged by Lala alone.

As a groom, I attended the wedding and married Lala and returned to Nepal.

(We held a wedding banquet in Hebei, China)

At that time, I didn't understand Chinese customs, and I thought that everyone was like me, and it only took courage to marry a Chinese girl, and I could have the happiness I dreamed of like me.

Five years later, by chance, I learned about Chinese marriage customs, that the man has to give the woman a lot of bride price, prepare a house, a car, and pay for the wedding banquet.

And I married Lala without spending a penny, and I realized that I was the luckiest and happiest man in the world.

(We set up wine at Lala's house)

After we got married, Lala followed me to live in Nepal and we moved into my parents' house.

In Nepal, it's a big family life. After my sisters and sisters got married, they naturally moved into my husband's house, and all three of us brothers and wives lived with our parents.

In this extended family, the man is responsible for making money and handing it over to his wife, the mother is in charge of the family's financial expenses, and the daughters-in-law are jointly responsible for household chores such as cooking and cleaning, and take care of the lives of everyone in the family.

Nepali men don't have to cook, do laundry, and basically can't cook.

(Us and my parents)

The advantage of living together in a large family is that if there is any problem at home, everyone can help each other and negotiate a solution together, and no matter how difficult things are, they can solve them.

For example, my mother couldn't move after suffering from a cerebral hemorrhage, and after being discharged from the hospital, she stayed in bed for 5 years before she passed away.

During that time, in addition to my father taking care of her, my sister-in-law and sister-in-law at home were also by her side at all times.

In addition, because of the continuation of such habits, Nepalese people rarely get divorced.

(Let's welcome the good together)

In married life, it is impossible to be without contradictions, and no one's life is smooth sailing. If the conflict arises and is resolved by the husband and wife alone, many times, the emotions of both parties come up, and it is easy to break up.

If in a big family life, after the two husbands and wives quarrel, the parents and brothers can participate in time, persuade both parties to calm down, and do a good job of coordination between the two sides, which can effectively prevent them from acting impulsively and reduce the probability of divorce.

Of course, there are also disadvantages to living together. It is easy to lead to unnecessary conflicts between concubines and mothers-in-law.

At present, a small number of young couples in Nepal choose to "live in isolation". But extended family life still accounts for about 70%-80%.

(Lala and I are of the same heart)

After Lala married me, we took over the hotel of our former boss and started our own business, rarely staying at my parents' house.

But it didn't take long for the ex-boss to repossess his house on the grounds that his son was going to get married.

We moved to our current location, opened a hotel, and gradually expanded our business, opened a travel agency, and started a jewelry business.

I work with Lala, I am mainly responsible for the purchase of jewelry, the management of travel agencies and hotels, and the itinerary of tourists, while Lala is responsible for taking orders online, communicating with customers, and running the online store.

I don't have to worry about the part she's responsible for. Our husband and wife work together to complement each other, and business is getting more and more prosperous.

My previous boss's business was far worse than ours, and I was on a nodding acquaintance with him.

He would sometimes say to me sourly; "You're doing a good business, you're living a very good life, huh?" I feel like he's jealous like there's something I can't say.

(Our two daughters – when they were younger)

Lala learned a lot about jewelry with me, and she still understands jadeite. There is no jadeite in Nepal, and she is more professional than me in this regard. From time to time, she would tease me: "I used to be your student, but now I'm your teacher." ”

Two years after we got married, I used my savings to give her some gems, which she didn't take seriously at the time.

It wasn't until she learned about jewelry that she realized that the gems I had given her were valuable.

I smiled and said to her, "You thought they weren't worth much, did you?" ”

She also answered me happily; "We're the same kind of people! I have to wait until many years later to find out the truth, and it's really not like a family doesn't enter the door. "Indeed it is!

(We and our eldest daughter)

When it comes to the identification of rough jewelry, even the master sometimes misses. In 2014, I purchased a batch of rough stones from the Poles, looked at one or two samples of the rough amber stones, and the quality was OK.

As an honest businessman, I thought that the quality of that batch of rough should be like this, and I bought it and sold it to the customer.

Who would have expected that the customer found that some of the rough stones were fake and had quality problems! (I found out afterwards that during that time, there were suddenly a lot of fake amber rough stones in the market) I didn't say a word, and immediately refunded the customer's $3,000.

This loss made me soberly realize that I can't just rely on experience and trust in doing things in the future, but I must be extra careful, losing money is a trivial matter, and I can't lose my reputation as a business.

This is the only accident that has happened, and it is a profound lesson for me. Since then, if I have the slightest doubt, or buy in bulk, I will send it to the gem identification center for testing, just in case.

(Now me and my daughters)

After we got married, we were busy running our business, and I rarely had time to accompany Lala back to China. Lala didn't believe in the level of medical care in Nepal, our eldest daughter was born in China, and then I went to China to bring my wife and daughter back to Nepal.

It wasn't until the birth of my eldest daughter that my mother realized that my relationship and marriage with Lala was very stable and happy.

In addition to work, I also cook, clean, and take care of children at home. My dad once joked to me: "You didn't cook before, but now you need to cook and clean!" ”

Over time, my parents accepted our marriage and loved Lada until they died.

Later, Lala's confidence in Nepal's medical care led to the birth of her second daughter, who is now 12 and 7 years old.

(Lada and daughters)

In Nepal, public schools are very cheap. But in order for our daughters to receive a better education, we decided to send them to a private school. There are very good British international schools in Kathmandu, with annual tuition fees of around $15,000, which is expensive but much cheaper than in China.

There is also a church school in the United States (there are schools in 140 countries) and the quality of teaching is also very good, and I am very happy that my daughters attend this school.

(Article by a reporter from Anhui Economic Television Station that year)

I was lucky to be married to Lala, who is not only kind and intelligent, but also works very hard. Most of our customers are from China, and they all rely on her to run the business, and our business is booming, and our life is very comfortable.

Lala and I have a very good relationship and rarely argue. Except that I think she sometimes dotes too much on her daughters, and I will point it out in time. For example, because of their young age, their daughters buy a lot of things they don't need, and Lala will satisfy them all and don't know how to refuse.

But this kind of spoiling is absolutely not okay, after all, they are children, many times they don't know how to measure, as parents, they need to set standards for them.

At times like these, I will stand by my strict father's position, and Lala will follow my advice.

On top of that, Lala is the head of the family and she makes all the decisions for our family.

(Our lives are beautiful and happy)

Life in Nepal is much slower than life in China. Because the cost of living is very low, a family of three, the monthly living expenses only need 1,000 yuan (not considering accommodation), so people do not feel a lot of pressure, nor do they have a lot of initiative.

Chinese people will live harder, most people want to make more money, have a sense of career, it will be very curly, and the pressure on Chinese will be relatively large.

Generally speaking, Nepal's economy is much more backward than China's, but people's living conditions are relatively relaxed and comfortable.

(We are at a party in Nepal)

Lala's hometown is in Hebei, and it is very cold in winter.

The weather in Nepal is beautiful all year round, and she is used to life in Kathmandu, Nepal because of me, which is the legendary "love a city because of one person".

My father-in-law is now 80 years old and he has been living with us for almost 2 months now. Due to the language barrier, he felt bored and often clamored to return to China as soon as possible.

Lala's sister also came with my father-in-law this time, but my sister's mother-in-law and grandson were temporarily ill and the family was short of manpower, so she went back quickly and stayed only for a month.

(Our family and my father, father-in-law, and aunt are traveling in Thailand)

Now, we need to run our business together, we can't go abroad often, but we will arrange 1~2 days off from time to time to enjoy life together.

In the future, when our daughters grow up, if they want to go back to China to go to university, we will fully support them. When they go to university, we will think about living in China.

Lala and I have been married for 15 years and we are very comfortable together, whether we live together or do business, we are quite silky together.

The most is the infinite meaning of the gaze, déjà vu in the previous life. I am grateful to the Anhui reporter, it was her travelogue that allowed me to lock in the relationship with Lala, so that we can be happily together for the rest of our lives.

[Dictation: Nepalese Blessing Babu]

[Written by: Beacon Flame]

[Editor: Wuxi Wu]

We can't experience different lives, but we can feel different life trajectories here, every photo here is a bit of life, every story is a real life, if you also like it, please click to follow!

(*This article is based on the oral statements of the parties, and the authenticity is the responsibility of the oral narrator.) Friendly reminder from this account: Please identify the relevant risks by yourself, and do not blindly follow the trend to make impulsive decisions. ）

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Personal opinion, for reference only