My name is Li Qiang, I Chinese New Year's Eve am eight years old today, I am the third in our Li family, I have an elder brother named Li Ming, and my sister is called Li Hong, both of whom are several years older than me. My mother, who is sixty-seven years old, sat on the old sofa in the living room that day, knitting a sweater and sighing. I know that behind this sigh lies a lot of wordless anxiety and unwillingness, all for our children.
"Mom, what are you sighing again?" I asked softly.
"Hey, it's nothing, when you're old, you love to nag. The mother forced her to act as if nothing had happened.
On this day, my brother and sister left early, and I ended the weekend family banquet as usual. My father was in poor health and retired early, living on a meager pension, and my mother had to take care of him at home, while also dealing with the chores of our three siblings.
The elder brother Li Ming has a successful career, is a middle-level manager of the company, and is busy all day long, either on business trips or socializing, and his time is always filled with various meetings and reports. Sister Li Hong is not far from married, but she also has to work and take care of her children, and she is very busy.
On the other hand, I, a small businessman, wander around the community every day, and I have a relatively free time. It seemed fair to both of them, each of them taking care of their parents once every three months, so that each of us would not be too tired, and the elderly would be accompanied.
But I know that my mother doesn't like this, and every time she changes places, she has to adapt again, and there is an unspeakable guilt in her eyes.
Once, my father was pruning his love flowers in the garden, and I made a decision to talk to my parents about this retirement issue.
"Dad, why is Mom so sullen?" I asked tentatively as I took the scissors to help.
The father stopped what he was doing, "Your mother, she is always worried about the east and the west, the three of you are all married, and she still wants to be able to walk around you more." ”
"What do you think about this rotational pension?" I asked.
"Well, I don't know, I think they're busy, and I don't want to trouble you. There was a hint of helplessness in my father's voice.
"Actually, I think as long as you and your mother are happy, we can do whatever we want. "I tried to comfort him.
"Qiangzi, you are right, but you don't know about your brother and sister's situation. Father looked a little hesitant.
To be honest, this kind of emotional topic has always been very heavy to talk about in our family. No, at dinner on Saturday, I brought it up while everyone was there.
"Brother, sister, we are not young, we should still think about the problem of our parents. I was the first to speak.
Li Ming put the chopsticks down, "Oh, this matter, isn't it good to take turns?"
Li Hong also echoed, "Yes, it's fair for us to divide it like this, everyone is worry-free." ”
I looked at the wrinkles slowly creeping up my parents' foreheads, and I felt mixed feelings, "But, are my parents really happy?"
The atmosphere fell silent for a while, and even the usually noisy children were quiet, only to hear the clock ticking. In fact, I know that this topic will be discussed on the table sooner or later, after all, a home needs to be built by heart, not a simple rotation system.
In the following months, the topic of "taking turns to care for the elderly" was like a stumbling block, silently across the hearts of our whole family. I'm notoriously kind, but even I feel a little powerless in this matter. Every weekend, the three siblings and I still go back to our hometown for dinner, but the atmosphere is quietly changing.
My mother is a smart person, she saw my troubles at a glance, pulled me in private, and gently persuaded: "Qiangzi, don't worry too much, your father and I have been through ups and downs for so many years, what is this matter?"
"Mom, I feel bad when you always say that. Brother, they are not easy, can there be a better solution?"
My topic duly sparked a discussion at the family table. Li Ming and Li Hong still had the same attitude of going their own way at first, but after a period of silence, the face-to-face sincere dialogue still narrowed the distance between our hearts.
"Brother Ming, do you really think it's good now? Mom and Dad change places every three months, they are old, and what they need is a stable living environment. "I tried to open the knot in their hearts.
"I... I also know, but our own lives are also stressful, and the company is getting more and more things day by day. Li Ming put down his chopsticks, looking a little at a loss.
"But we have to find a way, we can't all push my brother here. Li Hong agreed.
"Do you think I have that idleness?" I was a little excited, "my store's rent has just been raised, and my business is getting worse day by day, how can I have the time and energy to take care of this?"
Silence fell on the table again, and his father slowly put down the dishes and chopsticks in his hand, and he sighed deeply: "I haven't done anything big in my life, I just want to raise you well, and when you are old, it will be a problem to even have a stable old age." ”
"Dad, it's not like that, we all want the best for you. Li Hong was in tears.
"Then we'll have to sit down and figure out the best of both worlds. Li Ming lowered his head and said in a deep voice.
This was the first time that our family had a disagreement when deciding on important family matters, and everyone's faces showed unprecedented anxiety and heaviness. This night, we couldn't find a solution, everyone has their own little Jiujiu in their hearts, although everyone has the same original intention, but they are helpless.
In such a stalemate day, an unexpected scene happened to us. At a small family gathering, no one noticed that the children muttering in the corner knocked over the flower pots, and the room was suddenly in chaos. His father felt sorry for his flowers, and bent down to clean them up with tears and laughter, and all his sorrows seemed to turn into dust in the soil.
I looked at my father's slightly hunched back, and suddenly realized that this family needed more than just taking turns to take care of it, but a love and responsibility that did not ask for anything in return. In my sight, my brother and sister also looked at my father in a daze, and the guilt and love in their eyes were nowhere to hide.
At that moment, it seemed that all the disputes and dissatisfaction had disappeared, and we finally understood that what our parents needed in their old age was not the care of the battle, but the real companionship and understanding.
Soon after, on a weekend, we gathered at our parents' house as usual. After dinner, my father suddenly brought up a topic that everyone had avoided talking about for a long time.
"I see that no matter how you see this family, it is still me and your mother who take a lot of money. Smoking a cigarette, my father opened in a deep voice.
Brother Li Ming disagreed, "Dad, why do you care about this, we don't pay for it." ”
Sister Li Hong followed up and said, "Yes, my brother and I also give money to the family every month, is there any misunderstanding?"
The father poked the table, and his voice was a little high, "I know what you give, but have you ever calculated, is your money enough? This is not a matter of money, this is a matter of the heart, do you have an old couple in your heart!"
"Then what do you say?" the elder brother looked a little displeased, obviously dissatisfied with his father's accusations.
I stood up and broke the tension at this moment, "Dad, don't get excited, my brother and sister are also in trouble." ”
My father seemed to have been backlogged for a long time, and finally said it, "What am I excited about, I haven't tried anything for you in my life, but can you think about it from the standpoint of me and your mother?"
The atmosphere in the air became more and more solemn, and everyone's expressions revealed different levels of anxiety and struggle. The matter of money seems to have suddenly become a gap between us.
I tried to control the argument that was about to get out of control, "Brother, sister, Dad didn't mean to let us pay more. Dad, you don't actually want us to be like that, everyone is in the same family, what can you sit down and talk slowly?"
The elder brother was silent for a moment, and finally frowned and said, "Qiangzi is right, we should indeed sit down and talk." ”
My sister looked at me and my brother, and she knew that if she continued like this, it would only make her parents more sad, so she lowered her attitude, "We don't want to upset you, we will find a way to solve it." ”
But the problem is not so easy to solve, although everyone's position has loosened somewhat, but the real contradictions have not been resolved. After dinner, we talked separately, but neither of us gave a definite answer.
After this dispute, the atmosphere at home became even heavier, and Li Ming and Li Hong felt heartache with their backs of guilt and unwillingness to leave. My father silently cleaned up the dishes and chopsticks, and the back was the loneliness I didn't want to see in my life.
My mother looked at my father and turned her head to look at me, and she sighed deeply, "Qiangzi, it's useless to be a mother, and she can't even arrange her old age." ”
I hugged my mother tightly, crying in my heart, "Mom, don't say that, we'll find a way." ”
At this point, the conflict in the family seems to have reached a new climax, and everyone has different sorrows in their hearts, and they are all looking forward to the emergence of a solution.
Shortly after that altercation, our old neighbor, Grandpa Wang, learned about our family's situation. He is my father's chess friend for many years, and he is also an elder who everyone in our area respects. One afternoon, Grandpa Wang knocked on our door with a cane.
"Lao Li, I heard that your family has not been quiet lately?" said Grandpa Wang with a smile as he sat down.
"Hey, you know. Dad smiled bitterly, "It's all because we didn't teach the children well." ”
Grandpa Wang patted the back of his father's hand, "Don't say that, children also have children's difficulties." The key is how you think, how you understand and how you tolerate. ”
In this way, Grandpa Wang threaded the needle in our family like a peacemaker, and raised the issue of involving the community to coordinate us, because he believed that a harmonious family needs understanding and communication, not confrontation and blame.
Through the arrangement of the community, our family came to the community service center. The social worker listened patiently to our doubts and difficulties, and guided us to explore solutions.
"Auntie, what I want is actually very simple, that is, I hope that my parents can be taken care of