Recently, the TV series "Mature Year" starring Hao Lei, Liu Yijun, Song Dandan, Zhang Guoqiang and others is being broadcast on CCTV.
Hao Lei, who "will not and will never bring goods", Liu Yijun of "Shuhuan Tiancai", Song Dandan who is "strong and straight-talking", Zhang Guoqiang who is "cute", a group of old drama bones with both traffic and acting skills, jointly present a social situation of "mature years" in the context of today's era.
The so-called mature year refers to a group of people who have entered middle age and are walking towards old age. They no longer have the vitality of youth, middle-aged Boli, replaced by powerlessness, anxiety about the passage of time, helplessness about the shortness of life and not arbitrariness.
In the play, the opening chapter begins with Zhang Chunmei (Hao Lei) talking about the social hot topic of "how to face aging" in the "Thinker" interview program, which resonates with the audience because of its close proximity to the hot spot of public anxiety, and introduces Zhang Chunmei's beauty, ability to talk and career success.
And behind Zhang Chunmei's seemingly glamorous costume, there is also a chicken feathers crawling with lice.
At the mother-in-law's birthday banquet, Zhang Chunmei, who was worried about the "parent", made arrangements, but her sister-in-law complained that it was expensive, and her husband wanted to hide, so far, a farce began.
A virtuous helper who respects her mother-in-law, runs a good family, raises children well, and has a successful career, Zhang Chunmei covers almost all the "virtues" that society defines for women. But it is such a perfect wife, but her husband Ni Weiqiang (played by Liu Yijun) insists on divorce. When the audience curses its scumbags, it is not difficult for us, as bystanders, to find problems between them.
First, Zhang Chunmei, who is all-rounded, makes Ni Weiqiang have no breathing space.
Zhang Chunmei's ability is vividly presented in just a few episodes. She is like an iron man who will never lie down. It is hard to imagine that a woman can face her husband's scandal, for the sake of the "consummation" of the family, continue to selflessly dedicate herself to the family, and even share worries for her lover, face the gossip girlfriend, and strive to solve the dilemma for her lover.
The "powerful" Zhang Chunmei takes care of her husband like a giant baby, but such "love" and "care" suffocates Ni Weiqiang.
The leader is the wife's "eyeliner", colleagues are the wife's friends, even their own students, the wife has to insert a kick. He couldn't decide where he slept because his wife was "worried about catching a cold"; He cannot handle the problem alone because his wife is "worried that he will not handle it well"; His work, life, his interpersonal communication, behavior... Everywhere is full of his wife's shadow, he wants to get rid of this arrangement and bondage, but he can't do anything, and finally breaks out in the form of divorce.
How to maintain the right sense of distance between people has always been an important topic in our interpersonal communication. Many times, we can control this boundary well, but when we are with close people, we often forget that it exists. It seems that intimate relationships are proved by integrating space, eliminating privacy, and closing the distance at the limit. But how far can such a suffocation mode go?
Second, Zhang Chunmei defines the appearance of the world with her own vision.
It can be seen in the play that there is a lack of communication between the two. When Ni Weiqiang communicated with Zhang Chunmei about the divorce, he talked about his mother's maintenance problem, and was directly rejected by Zhang Chunmei: "I can't ignore my mother", resolutely rejected, a filial daughter-in-law, an unfilial son, Ni Weiqiang has no room to speak. From this communication, it is not difficult to see that Zhang Chunmei, who can speak, can always force Ni Wei, who is not good at words, to be speechless, and has no desire to talk.
Zhang Chunmei confidently believes that the world is what she sees in her eyes, and she believes that Ni Weiqiang's world should also be what she sees in her eyes. Ni Weiqiang no longer communicates, and Zhang Chunmei also aggrieved her husband that he didn't understand.
Third, Ni Weiqiang's twisted life makes him unwilling to bear his due responsibility.
The mature group has passed most of his life, and the anxiety brought about by the passage of time makes Ni Weiqiang resentful and disgusted with his life.
When Ni Weimin (played by Zhang Guoqiang) goes to talk to him, he thinks that he has lived for others all his life, and he wants to live for himself once.
But such a person who "lives for others" does not know that his mother cannot eat high-oily and high-sweet food, does not know what grade his children are in, does not know that his wife is entering menopause, is facing menopause, and is still being squeezed out by the new generation in his career.
Why does a person who is obviously selfish feel that he is living for others all his life?
Because he didn't live the life he wanted, he thought he had sacrificed too much. In his own life, he plays a role that he does not like, which makes him depressed and depressed. I firmly believe that what I have at this stage is not what I want.
This can be seen from the fact that he put aside his research, concealed the disappearance of his family, and went to the young man's site ---- motorcycle camp to repair his bike. He doesn't want the title of professor, he doesn't want an orderly family, he doesn't want money, he doesn't want fame, he wants a person to do what he wants, leaving behind age and identity.
Compared with the eldest brother Ni Weimin's family, Ni Weiqiang can be described as living in a honeypot, he has favorable economic conditions, a respected job, a virtuous and open-minded wife, and a son who competes for academic strength...
Everyone believes that Ni Weiqiang "does not know happiness when he is in the midst of blessings", but after people have enjoyed enough "blessings", they will want to change their "blessings". Therefore, Ni Wei forced himself to change his life. Regardless of whether it affects the normal life of mothers, wives, children, and colleagues, blindly seeking breathing space for themselves.
It was a way for him to declare war on the rest of his life.
In fact, to be fair, when we scold Ni Weiqiang scum, how many breathless people who are overwhelmed by life want to be like Ni Weiqiang, abandon everything, to escape and enjoy their lives?
Fourth, misplaced efforts make the marriage full of holes.
Ni Weiqiang suddenly filed for divorce, and everyone asked: "Is there someone outside him?" ”
It seems that Mistress intervenes to be the only reason for the disintegration of marriage.
As Ni Weiqiang asked: "Why must there be someone?" ”
Obviously a stable marriage, why can't it go on?
Because people change, what was once tolerable becomes unbearable with changes in the social environment, lifestyle, and mentality. And the changes of the other party cannot form the same frequency as themselves, or even very different, such a marriage is difficult to maintain even if there is no third party.
In the marriage of Zhang Chunmei and Ni Weiqiang, it is impossible to judge who is right and who is wrong, Zhang Chunmei is a good wife with "traditional virtues" praised by everyone, but her good, Ni Weiqiang does not need. That such goodness, such love, is misplaced. The party who pays feels all kinds of grievances, and the party who gets it is tormented, and in the end, both are defeated.
Different from the mature crisis of the "high-grade" second family, the eldest family of the "ordinary small citizen" faces a much more down-to-earth maturity crisis.
The lives of Ni Weimin (played by Zhang Guoqiang) and Wu Ersu (played by Song Dandan), who have poor economic conditions, almost all revolve around money. Faced with problems such as sons marrying daughters-in-law and buying houses, they are facing self-care, pensions, and small ones.
The shrewd and calculating Wu Eryu is an unpleasant person. Disgusted with the birth of his daughter-in-law, he also shirked taking care of the elderly, and wanted to divide his mother-in-law's house for a while. Such "wicked people" are indeed disgusting.
But back to reality, the eldest brother who lives on bunk beds with Ersu, if he brings his mother and needs to live on the sofa night and night, the quality of life, which is not high, will not be mentioned, and it will also bring inconvenience to the family of four. Ersu is worried that the old house does not have his share because his eldest brother has contributed the most to the family, but he is least cared about by the elderly, and he wants to let the old man divide the house as soon as possible, which is indeed excusable. In the face of the daughter-in-law's complicated native family, I am afraid that my son will fall into difficulties in life, so I have repeatedly emphasized the importance of material foundation.
It can be said that Ni Weimin's mature crisis with Ersu is similar to most people's crises and is consistent with his peers. It quickly resonates with ordinary people.
The details of life such as the cupboard with the taste of mothballs and picking up relatives' clothes in the play are also delicate and real.
Through the eldest and second family, it can be said that the eldest family without money envies the financially well-off second eldest family, while the second eldest without economic pressure is pursuing to be alone.
In fact, no matter what kind of life we live, we will eventually regret it. Because it is only once, because it is irreversible. Instead of being anxious, enjoy every minute, every second.
And through "Ripe Year", we also see that the suffering of human beings is the same, but the form is different, the joy of poverty and poverty, the tribulation of rich and rich.
No matter what stage of life you are in and what hardships you are experiencing, instead of being anxious, it is better to enjoy every moment of life.