A French educator believes that Chinese treat children as adults, but adults as children. Indeed, under traditional education, children are asked to read the books of the sages when they are still very young. Of course, these books can only be understood by adulthood, so children are required to memorize them before speaking. However, when a person grows up, he or she is regarded as an "immoral subject" who cares for him or her everywhere, and even has no freedom of choice in marriage, so he or she is basically still regarded as an involuntary child.
For a long time later, this upside-down approach did not seem to change much. When children's hearts are still very brittle, they are indoctrinated with "class hatred has grown in their hearts" or blindly embrace something like that. And when a person grows up, he or she is strongly implied from various arrangements that he or she is a person without independent judgment, basically treating him or her as a child whose "sex" has not yet budged, so there are many obstacles to falling in love. In addition, it also trains people to look at things in a "typical" way rather than in a way that has the depth of "individualization". Therefore, in the novels and movies watched by "adults", it is always black and white, and you know who the "good guys" are and who the "bad guys" are at the beginning - in this way, children under the age of ten often have to ask their parents questions at the beginning of the movie. However, it is okay to say that Chinese treat adults as children, and to think that they treat children as adults, there is a definitional implication. Forcing children to accept things that they have not yet absorbed in their stage of spiritual development can naturally be counted as treating children as adults.
However, this does not mean instilling in them the idea of "equality of personalities." Because, since Chinese has "childized" adults, they do not even have the human dignity of adults, how to cultivate the human dignity of children.
Therefore, asking children to absorb things beyond their comprehension only paves the way for the future to "childize" adults. This method of imposing by external force is precisely to cultivate the "personality of other laws." In other words, don't let an introspective foundation of the "self" emerge. In traditional private school, children have to memorize things they do not understand, which naturally makes them afraid and interested in this boring and gloomy education. Therefore, the only way to do it is to use the word "strict". He had to make a face to intimidate the students, and most of them had a long bamboo pole that could reach every corner of the classroom to knock on the disobedient or unrecited schoolchildren at any time. All this, for children. It is unhealthy to develop.
In today's China, of course, this situation no longer exists. However, in order not to allow the introspective "self" to emerge, it is still common practice to instill a certain idea in a young child when he has not yet been able to choose. As for the traditional family education of Chinese, it is also in the same direction. Chinese the ideal standard that parents are required to meet is "strict father and mother". Therefore, the role of the mother must be kind and conniving, while the role of the father must be severe and intimidating to the child. Generally speaking, before the age of five or six, children spend their time with the connivance of a "loving mother", and after the age of five or six, they are under the whip of the "strict father" (therefore, here there also seems to be a formal division of labor between "raising" and "teaching"). However, no matter who shapes it, it does not develop in the direction of "individual" personality growth. Since "individuality" cannot appear, everyone's intention to live is concentrated on the same "physical" needs of everyone, and the main content of moral life beyond one's own "physical" needs is manifested in the care and care for the daily life of others, living and eating. In the family, the care of children by the "loving mother" is generally "nurturing", but it can only involve the need for "bodyization" - eating, dressing, sleeping - the meaning of which is "diet" as the main content. Originally, parents around the world can only take care of young children to this point, because the formation of "personality" is everyone's own business, and cannot be done for them. However, Chinese's upbringing of the next generation does not focus on the development of "personality", but only on catering to others, that is, cultivating the attitude of "peace is precious" and "strife". Moreover, Chinese emotional training of children is not to prepare them to be independent, but to make them permanently dependent on themselves.
Therefore, this stage of "bodyization" that satisfies the appetite is perpetuated indefinitely, that is, it is always regarded as a person who is only in one stage. Even if a person reaches the age of thirty or forty, in the eyes of the "loving mother", he will always regard him as a "little baby" who must always be stuffed with food, rather than as an adult whose "sex" has already sprouted - in this regard, the previous generation has always adopted a secretive attitude. Therefore, Chinese has a serious tendency to "desexualize" whether in terms of thoughts and feelings, or in terms of body shape and posture. This style of always treating children as "little babies". You can use a passage from Lu Xun to comment: "All children are only the material of their parents' blessings, not the germ of future 'people'." (Lu Xun: "Hot Wind") The story of "Lao Lai Yu Family" in "Twenty-four Filial Piety" clearly expresses a person's eternal childhood state in front of his parents.
What Chinese society requires "Father Yan" to do is another task, that is, "teaching". As mentioned above, Chinese culture focuses on cultivating a "personality of other laws", so every "individual" must be regarded as an "immoral subject", not a "subject of conscience" or "subject of rights" who makes self-determination in an introspective way. Therefore, instead of training everyone to accept the norms of society in a "chosen" or "critical" way, it must be subdued by external force like a tamed beast. In order to complete this task, "Father Yan" must use intimidation and even "hit". Even if a person's temperament is not harsh, he must put on this face in front of his children, otherwise it will be considered to harm the next generation. As the Three Character Sutra says: "If you do not teach, the father is guilty; If the teaching is not strict, the teacher is lazy. ”
Since "Father Yan" "raises" his children by taming animals, he is often referred to as "beast" when beating and scolding children even if they are adults. However, if the trainer's electric whip cannot remove the last remaining bit of bestiality from lions and tigers, then this "other discipline" method of Chinese cannot remove the last bit of "selfishness" of purifying man, in addition to creating an attitude of no personality, no dignity, and submissive in the main content of personality. As a result, Chinese was forever kept in a state of "otherness" childhood. Lu Xun said it well: Chinese "As usual, he is the guy who makes children, not the father of 'people', and when he gives birth to children, he is still not the germ of 'people'." (Lu Xun: "Hot Wind")
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