01
Xiao Tianxin, who I haven't seen for a long time, was on the hot search, I thought something was wrong, click in and see, it was originally caused by Xiao Tianxin opening a certain sound account. Time has passed too quickly, and the eccentric little girl who playfully said "we are white" has now grown into a generous girl.
Xiao Tianxin is ten years old, and she is also the age to contact the online world.
She will see the filthy words on the Internet that we have been worried about one day.
But I still want to take this opportunity to say my opinion, some netizens are really too idle, is there nothing to do, emotional disputes between adults, what is related to children. The two of them have solved it themselves, and they have been separated for so many years, how come there are always some netizens who cling to those things.
Is it interesting?
Xiao Tianxin opened her own certain sound account, just because her cover picture is set up with a family portrait, will it attract so much criticism?
Isn't it normal for a child to love his mom and dad the most?
A blogger said unashamedly: If she grows up and learns what her mother did, will she change the background, a low-quality artist.
Why change the background, even if you know what happened to her father and mother? For Tianxin, as long as her parents' love for her has not diminished, it is the best. In my heart, I admire Jia Nailiang and Li Xiaolu's divorce model: they had to separate because of some reality, and the feelings of adults dispersed, but they never forgot to love Xiaotianxin.
In the matter of raising Tian Xin, the two of them were quite conscientious, and the matter was behind for a while, and there was no more dispute.
Their very rational divorce model also makes Tianxin grow up healthy, and every time we appear on camera, we can see that Tianxin is so confident, sunny, and generous, she has childlike innocence, and her stretched state can heal us.
The magnitude of the impact of parental divorce on children depends not on the divorce itself, but on both parents.
Is it possible that because her mother may have done something wrong, she must always nail her mother to the pillar of shame, and make the child hate what her mother has done? Why live so badly? It's already unfortunate, and you still want to let the child live with a bad temper? I especially don't understand what those with malicious intentions think? How is their world so dark!
It is best not to involve children in the emotional affairs of adults, we are not people in the bureau, and some things are not something that we outsiders can see through. This world is not black and white, the relationship between two people is broken, let alone the reason for one person, the parties have not pursued, but also see very open, have always been in harmony with it, what do you have to be angry about.
Does it have anything to do with you?
The most important thing we should do is to be more kind to our children, and as for those old things, there is no need to mention them.
02
Is Li Xiaolu a good mother? We can't say, only Tian Xin herself can judge; Whether Jia Nailiang is a good father or not, we can't say, only Tian Xin herself can judge. Since Tian Xin has set her account cover as a family portrait, it shows that in her mind, her parents are the best.
This is enough, although the adults are separated, their love for the child is not diminished in the slightest.
Over the years, we have also seen Xiaotianxin's happy growth, beautiful and more and more excellent.
My previous understanding of adult emotional affairs was black and white, but after watching "Golden Wedding", I deeply understood the complexity of marriage and the complexity of adult emotional world. Tong Zhi, played by Zhang Guoli, was on the verge of cheating for a while, although he did not cheat physically, he must have cheated on his soul, and he was moved by Li Tianjiao, which is why Wen Li insisted on separating from him later. I didn't understand why Wen Li chose to forgive Tong Zhi before? But after reading the original book, I understood that it is precisely because they have experienced so much that some of them cannot be put down, and it is impossible to put them down.
Li Tianjiao's appearance is just a small episode in their marriage.
Many people will be afraid of marriage after watching "Golden Wedding", and I also once felt that the quality of Wenli's marriage was not high, but whose marriage road can be perfect? In fact, Tong Zhi is still quite responsible for Wenli in many aspects, but later the two lived longer and longer, there were contradictions and disputes, and Tong Zhi's feelings temporarily wandered.
It was the two of them who did not communicate in time, which led to the gradual separation later, but fortunately, they still failed to separate afterwards.
It is difficult for us to guarantee that we will not make any mistakes emotionally in this life, men and women alike, but once some mistakes occur, the indestructible home you thought of could be destroyed. Some people will still reflect and regret it, and will think of making up for the child more and minimizing the harm to the child. This approach is still quite reasonable, at any time do not let the adult's fault involve the child, the responsibility must be fulfilled.
The marriage of Tong Zhi and Wen Li has its historical particularity, but it also allows us to see the complexity of marriage.
I also had contact with a reader who asked her if she resented her cheating husband. She said that when she first learned the truth of the matter, she was very resentful, and she wanted to cut him by a thousand cuts, feeling that she couldn't treat him too much, that he didn't have the face to face our daughter, and that he had destroyed our beautiful home. But then I wondered if our marriage had already gone wrong, and after I figured it out, I didn't have so much grudge against him, as long as he was still willing to be good to the child, I still agreed to let him see the child. I will try to maintain that he is a good father, and I will not bring things between us adults to children.
"I hope my daughter can grow up happy, what is the point of living her life with hatred? Let the child hate her own father? There is no need! He cheated and betrayed me, which can only mean that there is a problem with the relationship between the two of us, and it is between the two of us. If you don't love, separate and separate, what is there to resent. I was so angry at first because he lied to me. We met later, but no one mentioned the incident of that year, it passed, and I just wanted to live every day of the present. ”
I'm not whitewashing anyone, I'm just saying that they adults have their own emotional complexities, and all we can do is be kind to our children.
Of course, divorce will have an impact on children, but how to minimize the harm is the most important issue for parents.
How much divorce affects children depends on the parents' cultivation.
The dispute between Li Xiaolu and Jia Nailiang back then is not something that we outsiders can see clearly, and Li Xiaolu also paid her due price, and has not appeared in the public eye since then. But can't we keep nailing Li to the pillar of shame because of this incident, and the emotional affairs between people, can we outsiders talk about it? They are already getting along, so why do you have to hold on?
It's all gone.
You know, attacking either parent is an attack on the child.
It is still necessary to protect the child's young mind and try to make the child grow up happy.
All children hope to have a father to love their mother, and Li and Jia can do this, and Xiaotianxin is still lucky. I also hope that more divorced parents can properly handle their relationships with each other, as long as the other party is still willing to love their children and love their children, do not obstruct, and there is no need to obstruct. In fact, after divorce, you should learn to love children.
And when you really love your children, it is good for them, and it is also good for you.
END.